How to visit a loved one with Alzheimer’s

First things first

• Plan your visits strategically
• Limit visitors to one or two people at a time. Too many people can be overwhelming.
• Schedule visits for the time of day when your older adult is usually at their best.
• Minimise distractions by keeping the environment calm and quiet. Turn off the TV or loud music and ask any non-visitors to go to another room.
• Send this list to your visitors ahead of time so they’ll have time to absorb the information.

Do

• Keep your tone and body language friendly and positive.
• Don’t speak too loudly.
• Make eye contact and stay at their eye level.
• Introduce yourself even if you’re convinced they know you. “Hi Grandma, I’m Joe, your grandson.”
• Speak slowly and in short sentences with only one idea per sentence. For example: “What a beautiful day. The sunshine is nice, isn’t it?”
• Let them take their time; don’t rush the conversation.
• Use open-ended questions with no right or wrong answers.
• Sit together in silence; they may enjoy that just as much as talking.
• Allow them to express sadness, fear, or anger.
• Go with the flow of the conversation even if they talk about things that aren’t true or don’t make sense; you need to enter their reality.
• Share and discuss memories of the past as they’re more likely to remember things from long ago.
• Come prepared with an activity, like something to read out loud, a photo album to look at, or some music to listen to.
• Covid allowing, give gentle touches and hugs.

Don’t

• Say “do you remember?”
• If they say something that’s not correct, just let it go and don’t argue.
• Don’t point out mistakes; it just makes them feel bad and doesn’t help the conversation.
• Many people have moments of clarity so don’t assume they remember anything.
• If something means or nasty is said, try not to take it personally; the disease can twist their words or make them react badly out of confusion, frustration, fear, or anger.
• Talk down to them; they aren’t children and you should show the proper respect.
• Don’t talk about them with others as if they’re not there.

* Source: dailycaring.com