Sonke Gender Justice, an organisation that works to resolve issues of gender-based violence, recently spoke to the News about the mind of the abuser.
“There are several issues that lead to abuse, and some abusive men regret their actions afterwards, although there are men who plan to abuse beforehand,” said Sonke spokesperson, Vusi Cebekhulu.
Vusi said one of the key factors which plays a huge role in the lives of abusive men is the modern lifestyle they lead, which can activate hidden emotions.
“Career-driven, successful women have an effect on abusive men. They are jealous of the woman’s accomplishments and as a result they opt to use force on women to prove their physical strength and boost their self-esteem or ego,” said Vusi.
Women who find themselves on the receiving end of abuse need to understand they are never at fault, although they blame themselves.
The #menAreTrash movement has revealed the intensity of abuse and highlighted the countless women who have lost their lives because of the behaviour of the men they loved. However, the movement also brought forward thousands of men who do not want to be associated with gender-based violence. They stood up against the phenomenon and created the #notInMyName movement
Simo Sephuma of Krugersdorp said there are many men who protect their communities and never abuse, but the focus is only on abusive men.
“I understand that there are abusive men who kill women and children, but what is being said to encourage the few good men?” asked Sephuma, who is the father of three children.
Who do you call when you need help?
Victims of abuse can call the LifeLine counselling line on 0861 322 322 and be assisted in dealing with trauma, suicide and relationship issues.
Women in abusive relationships who need shelter, counselling and legal support, rape survivors and survivors of incest can call People Opposed to Woman Abuse (POWA) on 083 765 1235 or visit their website at www.powa.co.za.
The Family and Marriage Association of South Africa (Famsa) has 27 offices nationwide and offers counselling and education to strengthen marriages and relationships within the family. Famsa assists with domestic violence, grief counselling, divorce, mediation, and so forth. They can be reached through their national helpline on 011 975 7106/ 7 or they can be e-mailed at national@famsa.org.za. Alternatively, people in need of help can visit their website at www.famsa.org.za.
Sonke Gender Justice also has a helpline, on 011 339 3589.
Do you perhaps have more information pertaining to this story? Email us at krugersdorpnews@caxton.co.za or phone us on 011 955 1130.
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