Not In My Name International has mourned the death of Cameron Waldeck-Cooks, a 17-year-old St Stithians pupil found dead at a Sabie lodge.

Lesego Mahlangu, activist and Not In My Name member, writes: “Not In My Name International joins the Waldeck-Cooks family, the St Stithians community, and the country in mourning the death of Cameron Waldeck-Cooks, a 17-year-old Grade 11 pupil whose body was discovered on August 3 at a lodge in Sabie, Mpumalanga.

Read more: School communities unite in grief after tragic loss of St Stithians learners

“As per ongoing investigations by Mpumalanga police and an independent forensic pathologist appointed by the family, preliminary postmortem findings indicate that Cameron died as a result of strangulation and suffocation. Police have opened a murder investigation.

“Reports also indicate that 19-year-old Ethan Coetzee, who was found at the same scene, is believed to have died by suicide. We note that these findings remain preliminary and that the investigation remains ongoing. We echo the Waldeck-Cooks family’s own appeal that speculation should not be presented as fact while the investigation and forensic process continue.

“The incident surrounding Cameron’s death is one that society must condemn without tiring. It is a painful reminder that gender-based violence and femicide in South Africa does not discriminate by gender, age, race, or class. Violence is not confined to one community, and neither should our response to it be. The continued rise of gender-based violence demands collective responsibility from every sector of society.

“As the ongoing investigation points towards an apparent murder/suicide, we are called to reflect more deeply on the nature of intimate partner and close relationships, which are often shaped by toxic masculinity and harmful patriarchal norms. These are social conditions that not only place women and partners at risk; they dehumanise men by discouraging vulnerability, emotional expression, and healthy ways of responding to conflict, rejection, and emotional distress.

“For this reason, conversations on gender-based violence cannot continue to be framed solely as conversations for women. While women continue to bear the greatest burden of this violence, meaningful prevention requires us to engage men and boys intentionally. We must demand spaces where they are not only spoken to, but where they are encouraged to speak openly about masculinity, emotional wellbeing, accountability, and violence.

“Challenging toxic patriarchal structures is not simply about protecting women; it is equally about preventing young men from becoming both perpetrators and victims of the same destructive system.
“This case, and the way it has been publicly reported, also raises a question that we believe society must confront honestly.

The public face of gender-based violence in South Africa rarely includes white victims and perpetrators, even where evidence, including in this case, suggests that violence knows no racial boundaries. We raise this not to diminish the experiences or grief of any other family or community, but because confronting gender-based violence honestly requires us to confront the assumptions we make about who can become a victim and who can become a perpetrator.

“Therefore, this moment brings us to reflect on how we, as a society and as media consumers and producers, communicate about tragedies of this nature. Cases such as this are too easily consumed through sensationalism, ragebait, and unverified speculation, which spreads faster than verified fact.
“We call for a deliberate shift away from this culture, towards dialogue that is responsible, reflective, and grounded in truth. Such dialogue respects the integrity of ongoing investigations, honours the dignity of grieving families and allows society to engage seriously with the structural issues these tragedies expose without turning real human suffering into content.

Also read: Community pays tribute to St Stithians teens found dead in Mpumalanga

“As we mourn and stand in solidarity with the Waldeck-Cooks family, we also extend our sympathies to the Coetzee family, who are mourning the loss of a young man believed to have been caught in the same cycle of toxic masculinity and violence that continues to devastate families and communities across South Africa.”

The views expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of the Randburg Sun.

This article deals with gender-based violence and suicide. If you or someone you know is struggling, South African Depression and Anxiety Group’s 24-hour suicide crisis helpline can be reached on 0800 567 567, and the gender-based violence command centre is available on 0800 150 150.

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