Dysfunctional families fuel Alexandra’s youth struggles
When children grow up in dysfunctional homes, the damage goes far beyond the household walls.
The struggles of young people in Alexandra are not simply about poverty or overcrowding.
They are deeply tied to the silent wounds of dysfunctional families, according to Thumeka Joos, co-ordinator and dialogue facilitator at Thusong Youth Centre. She said, behind every troubled learner, every child who lashes out, and every teenager who drops out of school, there is often an unstable home where they were either neglected or exposed to violence.
As a dialogue facilitator, Joos has listened to countless stories that reveal the depth of this crisis. “In Alexandra, people are suffering because they come from dysfunctional homes. Some households are child-headed, parents are in Alexandra, but they do not stay with their children.”
She said consequences are far-reaching. Boys, left to fend for themselves, may turn to crime or abuse substances. Girls, seeking provision, often rely on older men, leading to teenage pregnancies, school dropouts, and lost opportunities to break free from poverty. She said, for some, the violence they experience at home frequently spills into schools, where they channel their anger onto peers. “When a child comes from a violent home, they are likely to unleash their anger on other learners.”
She stressed that the environment in Alexandra compounds these challenges, noting how families of ten or more are often crammed into a single room, where children witness drinking, fighting, and arguments as part of daily life. She said, in other homes, parents live estranged under the same roof, creating emotional distance that leaves children confused and unsupported.
She pointed to a young man, whose story illustrates the cycle vividly. He was scarred by constant domestic fights, dropped out of school, began clashing with his father, and later fought with peers in the streets. His aggression, according to Joos, became a way of coping with the trauma he carried from home. “He wanted to fight all the time because of what happened at home.”
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She explained that these tensions often escalate into serious harm, injuries, possibly criminal charges, and ruined futures. Yet, there is hope. Thusong Youth Centre has stepped in on multiple occasions to provide counselling and reconciliation to those who need it. Joos said the same young man who dropped out, eventually returned to school and began rebuilding his relationship with his father.
While she acknowledged that the scars of broken families run deep, she noted that with support, healing is possible. “Children from dysfunctional families need all the support they can get.”
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