Expert weighs in on why your child behaves badly
Understanding the root of the problem can help overcome your child's bad behaviour.
Dealing with a troubled child can be challenging, but there is help available to assist parents and guardians to bring out the best in a child.
Children do not come into this world with a user manual. Parents fear their children may behave badly while at school, upset their teacher, classmates or, worse, the principal.
As a mom and teacher, Cindy Glass, co-founder and owner of Step Up Education Centres, can relate.
She offered some advice and a new perspective to parents who are navigating the world of children misbehaving. She acknowledged that negative behaviour at school can affect all who associate with the individual who has behaved badly.
Parents, in particular, can feel angry, frustrated and even helpless when their child consistently chooses negative, self-harming behaviour.
“It is very easy for a parent to slip into ‘reaction’ mode and punish the child in ways that they may have experienced as a child.
It takes great courage, however, to choose to understand these behaviours and find positive, creative solutions,” said Cindy.
Negative behaviour at school has a solid and powerful root – fear. Fear of rejection, fear of not being good enough, fear that the teacher will notice that a child is struggling to understand the work, fear of being alone and fear of not being noticed and acknowledged. Many children would rather get into trouble for negative behaviour than let it be discovered that they are not coping with the pressures of school.
Children need to understand that all actions have consequences.
“Positive choices result in positive consequences and the same applies to negative choices. Being consistent in your expectations and consequences is essential. Fair, dependable boundaries are key to establishing a sense of stability in children. It takes courage not to shout, get excessively angry or perhaps even physically harmful toward a child who consistently misbehaves. I strongly recommend that you read the book Have a new kid by Friday, by Dr Kevin Leman. I did, and it completely changed my approach to dealing with my children!” exclaimed Cindy.
“There are no easy solutions, but with determination, patience and tons of love, you will be rewarded with more positive behaviour and it will be worth it!”
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