Hoping the memories outweigh the pain

The wife of late Covid-19 victim hopes her husband knows the family didn’t abandon him during his time of need.

Anthony ‘Tony’ Bastiman was a man of charm, a husband, a father, a friend and colleague, and as of 9 July, another victim to Covid-19 complications. His wife, Yola Bastiman gave insight into her fondest and most recent thoughts and feelings following the unfortunate passing of her husband in hospital. According to Yola, Tony was a mechanical engineer and had a variety of interests ranging from sailing, squash, cricket, off-road racing, Formula 1 and music having played the violin. Yola met Tony back in 1982 through a bridge club social circle.

At the time Tony was divorced and sad about not being part of his daughter’s life because his ex-wife had returned to England and taken the little girl with her. The two’s friendship continued to grow over the years and in April 1986 they said ‘I Do’ to each other. During the early hours of 9 July, Yola received the phone call she had been praying to avoid, informing her that Tony had passed away. The inability to be there Tony and endless thoughts of Tony feeling like his family abandoned him hurt Yola the most. When asked what she would say to Tony if she could speak to him one last time, she said, “We didn’t abandon you and I hope you understood that circumstances forced us apart. We so wanted to be with you to give you hope in the last weeks and comfort at the end.” This is a wish held by many due to Covid-19 forcing hospitals to suspend visits of the public regardless of the patient’s condition and Covid-19 status.

The many memories shared between Tony and his family will forever live on in their hearts. One of these cherished memories being the time he, Yola and their daughter (who was 12 at the time) Jessica Sian lost a gold ring while on holiday in Mauritius. The ring, which had belonged to Jessica’s grandmother, disappeared into the sand but Tony would not let anyone go to bed upset. She said, “I was very upset about it because it was my mother’s ring and our daughter was too. Tony searched through the sand meticulously square foot by square foot until he found the ring to our delight. It took him a long time but he was determined to find it.”

Such memories, along with his family describing him as ‘gregarious with a wry sense of humour who could also diffuse any argument’ will stay with his loved ones and those that knew him forever.