Are you considering adopting children of a different race?
What parents need to know before bringing children into a trans-racial family.
Beverley Beukes, managing director and social worker Simone Oketch of the Robin Hills-based orphanage, Oasis Haven have provided practical parental advice for parents considering adopting children of a different race.
“Most likely, you will be able to identify some areas in your current lifestyle where some changes can be made when you become a parent to a child of another race,” says Oketch.
“This might be as simple as finding racially diverse toys and books. It might mean changing churches, schools or suburbs to be part of a more racially diverse community. Whatever you do, your decision should be centered on your desire to truly become a trans-racial family.”
Beukes explained for families with adopted children and birth children, the entire family should engage in cross-cultural activities.
ALSO READ: Oasis Haven provides tips for strengthening trans-racial families in South Africa
“You’re in it as a family but looking to diversify your family is not just for the benefit of the adopted child. Your entire family is now trans-racial, and all races are equally important in shaping your family’s experience.
“If the activities you do are seen as ‘for the adopted child’, they may do more damage than good. Adopted children also need to see the positives in the culture they are being adopted into. Yes, they need to have positive feelings about their race. This is very important! But they also need to see the wonderful attributes of their parents’ cultures. They need to know that they belong to your family.
“For small children, this may mean pointing out things like having the same number of hands, eyes, toes, and ears. For older children, it’s acknowledging similar interests or habits with a parent or sibling or creating new traditions as a family.”
Beukes said a good bond between adults and children develops mostly as a result of lasting, loving and everyday care, and not only because a child is genetically related or looks similar to the parent.
The two women have put their education and their professional and personal experience to use in authoring a guide called Strengthening Families in a South African Context, which provides an overview of foster care, adoption and family preservation, as well as guidance for statutory and adoption social workers on supporting families.
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