Man from Secunda and his daughter to reunite after 50 years
Michelle has searched for her father since the age of 18 and recently came across a photo of him on the Ridge Times website.
After more than five decades of no contact, Kenneth (Ken) Jacoby (79) from Secunda and his daughter, Michelle (55), have finally found each other and plan a long-awaited reunion.
Ken last saw Michelle in Durban when she was about three years old. After divorcing Michelle’s mother in 1972, he lost all contact with his daughter. At the time, he worked for the South African Railways.
Michelle’s family frequently moved around the suburbs of Durban until she was 19. Meanwhile, Ken left Durban, worked in construction across Africa, and settled in Secunda in 2008.
Despite the years apart, they never stopped thinking about each other. Michelle, now living in Cape Town, had searched for her father since she was 18.
In an interview with the Ridge Times, she explained that her search proved difficult because she had little information about him.
“I didn’t know his date or year of birth, just the month. But I never gave up looking,” Michelle said.
Her biggest fear was that Ken had already died before she had the chance to meet him. A few years ago, she found out his birth year.
Recalling that her grandfather once mentioned Ken lived near Johannesburg in a town called Secunda, she intensified her search.
Finally, on January 3, a Google search led Michelle to an article on the Ridge Times website about a Dra Mekaar Seniors’ group meeting. In the article, she spotted a photo of Ken.
She contacted the group’s chairperson, Eileen Bezuidenhout, whose contact details were listed.
“I had so many questions and zoomed in on the photo. I knew my dad had tattoos on his hands, but his hands were hidden,” Michelle recalled.
Tattoos were the only memory she had of him from childhood.
“I asked Eileen if Ken was born on July 9, 1945, had tattoos on his hands, was ever married and had daughters. She answered ‘yes’ to everything,” Michelle said.
She then sent Eileen an old photo of herself with Ken as a baby.
“Eileen confirmed it was him and said she would speak to him the next day.”
Michelle was concerned about possibly disrupting Ken’s life if he had a family, but Eileen reassured her he had no family.
Eileen later took Ken out for breakfast and asked him about his past.
“Then she called me and put my dad on the phone,” Michelle said.
Hearing her father’s voice for the first time in over 50 years was overwhelming for Michelle.
“I kept telling Ricky, my partner, to pinch me. It felt like a dream,” she said.
Since reconnecting with Ken, Michelle has felt as if many missing pieces of her life have fallen into place.
She also shared the news with her family, and her daughter, Jacqueline, who lives in Connecticut, now keeps in weekly contact with her grandfather. Ken is also getting to know his great-grandchildren, Matteo and Annastasia.
“I want a relationship with my dad. My relationship with the rest of my family remains the same,” Michelle said.
She believes she was robbed of a father and her children of a grandfather. Now, she is determined to make up for lost time.
Michelle will land in Johannesburg on February 22 for their long-awaited reunion.
“My dad is turning 80, and I want to spend whatever time we have left together. There’s a lot of catching up to do,” she said.
Michelle, a two-time cancer and tumour survivor, is a mother of three and a grandmother of two. Ken never remarried but had a long-term partner who died after four years together.
“I tried many times to find Michelle, but nobody could give me any information,” Ken said.
Michelle was adopted by her stepfather in a closed adoption, making it even harder for Ken to locate her. Hearing Michelle’s voice and the words “Hi, Dad” for the first time was an emotional moment for Ken.
“It was heavenly. I thought I had lost someone forever, but now I have her back. I prayed for this day and her every night,” he said.
Ken is also a cancer survivor.
“I was a wanderer back in the day, but I never did drugs or got into trouble with the law,” he said.
Since reconnecting, he and Michelle speak daily, sometimes up to three times a day.
“We are only now getting to know each other. Michelle is a lot like me,” Ken said.
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