DEAR Editor;
It was with unbridled delight that I read Municipal Notice 149 of 2020.
Said notice was WhatsApped to me by a sympathetic and almost equally elderly friend.
The notice announced the special opening of the licensing department on four consecutive Saturday mornings to accommodate ‘elderly and/or frail’ persons who, due to Covid-19 lockdown, had difficulty renewing their licenses.
Having been twice turned away by the department which had reached its capacity of 80 per day, I firmly believed I fell into the ‘elderly and/or frail’ definition, probably the ‘and/or’ component.
Saturday, October 10 dawned with leaden skies, sporadic rain and a freezing southerly wind.
Warmly dressed and bearing numerous copies of required documentation shielded from the inclement weather, I arrived at the gate at 6.40am.
Imagine my dismay to find a queue had already formed, all complying with said definition!
I counted two wheelchairs, three crutches and a handful of walking sticks.
My feigned attempt at frailty, accompanied by a false limp received no sympathy and I was loudly heckled to ‘get to the back’.
I guessed I was about number 15 in the queue.
Shortly after joining the queue an elderly couple, he with a crutch, fell in behind me.
Alerted by some excitement I turned to find ‘Mr’ being castigated by ‘Mrs’ for forgetting his mask.
Dropping his crutch, he began frantically searching his multi-pocketed fishing vest for his car keys which were eventually located in the zip-up section!
He returned shortly and obviously had not located his mask as he was armed with a dishcloth of sorts which he and Mrs were unsuccessfully attempting to wrap around his head.
Identifying the opportunity to cash in on PPE corruption, I offered Mr a new mask at some multiple of its cost.
His relief was palpable, the racketeering commenced and the excitement abated.
Just after 7.30am, Assistant Superintendent Mervyn Moodley, resplendent in blue uniform with more yellow pips than the average mielie, addressed the motley crowd, which by that time had grown to nearly 40.
The department only opened at 8am but in sympathy with those waiting, due to the cold wind and sporadic rain he unlocked the gates and we were ushered in, suitably thermometer-ed, sanitiser sprayed and numbered.
Supt Moodley explained the procedure to be followed due to social distancing.
The offices accommodate only 10 applicants at a time. I was number 11!
We were instructed to stand on our numbers, painted on the tarmac at standard Covid-19 intervals, until summoned.
Shortly before 8am the first 10 were wheeled, pushed or assisted in.
My turn arrived not too long thereafter and I entered the warmth of the office.
The air of frivolity amongst the applicants was reminiscent of a cheese and wine party at a retirement home.
A delightful young woman was wandering amongst the geriatrics, assisting with completion of the forms, photocopying ID cards or advising those who had not, or could not, read the instructions.
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Following a sequence of musical chairs, I was ushered into the eye test office where Mdu Mchunu introduced himself, offered me a chair and, observing my state of anxiety, told me to ‘relax’.
I noticed Supt Moodley had rolled up his proverbial sleeves and was also busy processing applicants.
All went well until the fingerprint machine had difficulty in locating the remnants of the prints on my antique digits.
The procedure was then completed with confidence and competence by Mr Mchunu and I was then directed to Teller No 2, Praiseworth Ngwazi.
With equal competence and efficiency Mr Ngwazi relieved me of R340 and proceeded to stamp all my documents with the force reminiscent of the 1900s General Post Office!
I left the office at 8.40am to be greeted by the warm sun emerging from the grey clouds.
Not only were all the staff extremely helpful and accommodating but they were efficient and competent, resulting in what turned out to be a very pleasant experience.
JOHN MOWAT
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