Dr Martin Seligman, renowned “father of Positive Psychology” was elected the president of the American Psychological Association in 1998.  During his term in office, he did much to change the focus of psychology not only to make people less dysfunctional but to bring emotional healing and happiness.  He is a prolific writer, researcher and teacher. To try to condense his teaching down to a short article is challenging, but perhaps it can be outlined through the mnemonic PERMA.

ALSO READ : Turning the Tide – The role of emotional well-being in promoting health (4)

PERMA Positive Emotions

• These include things like pleasure and enjoyment through play and doing fun things, enjoying a tasty meal, listening to enriching music, reading a good book, going for a walk associated with beauty and inspiration. We feel positive towards life when we do things that build our spirit.

Engagement

• When we can become engrossed in hobbies and activities that we find enriching and interesting – it could be activities like gardening; playing a musical instrument; reading a good book; photography; sewing or knitting cooking as an art form; playing games or sports. Too many people look back on their days and feel like they just existed – just went through the motions of living, just passing the time.  It is important to find something to do that we can enjoy. It may be through work or through extra-curricular activities.  Obviously if you really enjoy what you are doing at work, that is an extra bonus.  I find this through seeing work as a ministry or an instrument to improve the lives of others.

Relationships

• Of course relationships can be good or bad. If our friends or acquaintances belittle us or apply pressure to do things we are not comfortable doing, we would be better off without them.  On the other hand, friendships can build us up and bring out the best in us, enhance self-esteem and be supportive.  This is where the functional and affirming family bond is so important.  Our children learn what love and trust and socialisation is all about through meaningful relationships.

Meaning

• Too many people have little sense of meaning in their lives. We find meaning from helping others, from accomplishing something worthwhile that benefits society, from being part of the big picture, from making a difference in this world.  “Research shows that religious or spiritual people generally have more meaningful lives because they believe in and worship something greater than themselves.”
• It is helpful to involve children in distributing gifts or food parcels to homeless people, or offering to assist at soup kitchens, or volunteering to help clean the park or roadside verge, or to visit orphanages or hospitals (when Covid is not around).

Achievement

• Having goals in life, even small goals: like exercising for 1/2 an hour each day; learning a language or to play a musical instrument; earn a diploma or degree;  grow vegetables, flowers or orchids; sew a dress; complete a difficult puzzle. The list is endless.  You can make lists of jobs that need to be done each day and tick these off as they are completed.
• It is helpful to acknowledge the achievements of others – our children or our spouse/partner. That builds self-confidence and a sense of accomplishment in them and brings self-satisfaction to us.

Here is a useful short article on PERMA, particularly as it relates to enhancing the happiness of our children.

Here is an article which includes a link to a TED talk he gave some years back.

Next week we will discuss ANTs – automatic negative thoughts, first propounded by Dr Daniel Amen, psychiatrist and specialist in brain disorders. 

Recognising these mindsets is the first step in healing.

To a positive approach to your week.

Dave Glass

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