Fixing a sour mother and daughter relationship

Mother to daughter relationships are complex and diverse. Some mothers and daughters are best friends. However there are those that have ups and downs, where the two are not on common grounds and don’t see eye to eye. Their fights spark over different issues and this puts a strain on to the relationship. The primary complains daughters have about their mothers are that, mothers try to parent them and are overly critical and demanding. From mother’s perspective, daughters don’t listen to them they make poor choices and have no time for them.Whatever your relationship with your mother or daughter, you can always make improvements.

Mending a broken relationship

Stephanie Dawson,  a relationship coach specialising in family dynamics, from Johannesburg says “ There are many things that may cause this kind of a relationship, one being a disobedient child. The daughter may be rude towards her mother, therefore mothers should learn not to take such behaviour personally because parenting comes with a lot of sacrifices and responsibility. Another reason that contributes to this kind of relationship is miscommunication between the two of them. It is  important that an open relationship is maintained at all time.”

Fixing an unhealthy relationship

• Respect

This goes a long way, it is a mutual thing that should come from both parties.

• Honesty,

In creating an open relationship honesty is very important, because you open a door of mutual  trust and confidence.

• Love

When love is visible, there will be no fights and doubts because at times some people need a sense of belonging and emotional security.

• Reconnecting

As individuals people need to be allowed to grow in their own space learn

Make the first move

Another fact that can help a strained is making the  first move, one doesn’t have to wait for another person to make the first move. Many think that the only way to improve a relationship is for the other person to change their ways. But as an individual you are not chained to their actions you can change your own reactions and responses.

Winds of change

In building a healthy relationship parents need to understand that times have changed. Some will have difficulties in accepting their child’s boyfriend. Stephanie suggests that, parents  need to allow their children to sink on their own.  “We live in the  twenty first century and one is compelled to change and understand. As things change your children’s will have choices that weren’t there during our time” she concludes.