‘I slept in the back of a Rolls Royce with a stripper!’ (Flashback Friday)

There has been much mention, on Facebook, ‘Benoni – Now and Then’, about buildings, barbers, schools, the post offices, cars and loads of other trifles of interest, but, where, I ask, is the spice, the gossip? Frankly, where are the stories about the people? Surely it is the people who make the town, that make Benoni what it is…. Even if it is a little sorta Peyton Place-ish!

I SLEPT IN THE BACK OF A ROLLS ROYCE WITH A STRIPPER!

Not just any stripper, mind you, her name, Kathy Keeton. The Associated Press called her one of the highest-paid strippers in Europe!

Right at this moment, some of Benoni is saying, who the heck is/was Kathy Keeton?

Those who do know have half-wry smiles on their faces, with the guys saying, “Eish, what a boytjie!”

I hardly think it would be very difficult to speculate what the ladies may be saying. I think it would sound something like a very cross cat!

The promised story:

It was not a dark and stormy night, to start with, as I remember. It got to be that, and much worse, later, figuratively speaking, of course!

My mom and dad had been invited out, to dine at the Bedford Hotel (North East corner Tom Jones and Cranbourne) at The Martinique Restaurant, that evening. Mom had declined the offer, but my dad went with his pals. He was not popular! My Old Lady gave him the houtoog even before he left. It didn’t help.

Later that evening, much, much later, Dad arrived home. He didn’t do it very quietly! With a load of protestations from my Mom, he awakened me. “Son, come with me, I have something very special to show you!” My Mom was not enchanted, to say the least! More houtoog!

Pyjamed, slippered and dressing gowned, I went downstairs!

Oh my goodness, there it was, the most beautiful car that I’d ever seen! It was a brand new Rolls Royce Silver Cloud! 

The owner of the Rolls was a gentleman called, Mr Bob Guccione. Later my Mom said that he was no bloody gentleman, he was a greasy little American wop. (At the time, I thought a Wop was some kind of American dish-wash gadget, something like those yellow plastic Dish-Wallahs of the time!) Mom said that he was so slick that doggy-doo wouldn’t stick to his shoe! She went on to say that he had more angles than The Man from the Pru! I took this to mean that this guy was like the actor Terry Thomas, a ne’er-do-well in the film, Tom Thumb.

With Mr. Guccione was a girl. She was barely eighteen years old. We were introduced. Her name, Kathy Keeton. (Thinks: The word barely seems inappropriate, but if the cap fits.)

Apparently, after Kathy’s show, my Dad had met Mr. Guccione, outside the Bedford. Dad’s persuasion resulted in all of us being invited for a drive in Guccione’s Rolls. My Mom declined, muttering something unheard in my Dad’s ear! I felt a storm brewing. The houtoog fell on deaf ears! (Irishism, I’m allowed to say that!)

I was transfixed as I leaned forward, perched between the front seats. I was eagerly absorbing all I could of this magnificent machine. Kathy was huddled, in the corner, on the back seat with me. She was very quiet, demure, somewhat reticent.

“How’s that for engineering, son? Thirty-five miles an hour and the loudest thing you can hear is the ticking of the clock!” We drove on.

I soon lost interest. I was only seven years old, after all. I curled up with Kathy and went to sleep!

So there you have my story, Benoni. I really did sleep with Kathy Keeton, a renowned stripper, no less, in the back of a Rolls Royce!

As would be expected, sadly, there is a little more to this tale.

As I curled up with Kathy, I came to the realisation that she was sobbing; sobbing very deep, but ever so quietly.

Whispering, I asked, “What’s wrong?”

Her reply, “Nothing”, she said, “Absolutely nothing!”

I felt empty and heart sore for the girl. I got a lump in my throat. I cried a little cry. I held her more tightly, she just sobbed. It has left me with the realisation that it was not me who was the kid in the back of that car, that night!

Kathy Keeton: Who was she, where did she hale from? Was she a Benoni girl?

Here’s what I could find from Wiki:

Kathryn “Kathy” Keeton (born February 17, 1939, South Africa – died September 19, 1997 (aged 58), New York, New York) was a magazine publisher along with her partner, and later husband,Penthouse publisher Bob Guccione.

Raised on a farm in South Africa, Keeton took up dancing in childhood to strengthen a leg affected by polio. She won a scholarship to the Sadler’s Wells Ballet in London, but left after she turned 18 to work in a nightclub. (in Benoni, in 1958?)

She appeared in bit parts in four British movies: Carlton-Browne of the F.O. (1959) (as a tabletop dancer), Expresso Bongo (1959), Too Hot to Handle (1960), and The Spy Who Came in from the Cold (1965) (as a stripper). At the age of 24 she was what The Associated Press called “one of the highest-paid strippers in Europe” (Ironically, Terry Thomas was in the film Carlton-Browne, along with Peter Sellers, and others!)

It was a scant nine years later that I found myself looking back on my experiences with a fierce intensity. I was fighting for my life. I was in a pretty bad shape.

I clung to each and every memory that I had. Like a favourite old video, I played them over and over again, in my mind.

A mantra to live by took form:

• You can always get back to the place, but you can never get back to the time!
• It is futile to waste energy on that which you are unable to change.
• Don’t feel sorry for yourself. This is selfish, plain as daylight!
• If you don’t give a shoot, why should anybody else do so?
• Turn your disadvantage around. Make it an advantage, but, remember, never take advantage, and never ever let anyone take advantage (of you).
• Don’t blame.
• Shut your big mouth and listen. You pray, and pray, and pray to God for what you want. Maybe He doesn’t want to give what you are demanding. Give God a chance, He will never forsake you. Simply give Him a chance to talk to you. Be quiet, you will hear Him. Thy will be done on Earth. Don’t forget this!
• Oh, and don’t pith your mom off, or she’ll give you the houtoog, big time!

It has become glaringly obvious to me that Guccione took advantage of Kathy Keeton. She was a naïve eighteen year old girl who was conscious of her leg having been afflicted with polio. She was determined to beat this, no matter the cost. Sadly Kathy was pounced upon and she was led astray. Fancy cars, acting in the movies…. C’mon, the kid was on a trip to nowhere, but was she?

Through her headstrong, never-give-up attitude, she made Guccione one of the World’s richest men.

You see, it wasn’t Guccione that was the driving force behind the Penthouse Magazine Empire; it was Kathy Keeton who did it all. Isn’t this what you’d expect from a girl from Benoni?

Thanks for your time.

Here’s Kathy, the Rolls, The Bedford and the Wop!: