I CONSIDER myself one of the lucky ones. I have never fallen victim to physical or sexual abuse.

However, that does not mean that I have not been subjected to sexual harassment – uninvited physical contact; unwelcome, unreciprocated and sometimes repeated verbal flirtations; ‘catcalling’;  invasions of personal space and the ever-inevitable verbal abuse one has to endure when one has declined or rejected any of these actions – all of which left me feeling uncomfortable, vulnerable, terrified and completely violated.

But, as I stated, I am one of the lucky ones… At 19 years of age, University of Cape Town student, Uyinene Mrwetyana was not.

ALSO READ: Uyinene Mrwetyana’s alleged killer had previously been accused of rape

Three days after South Africa commemorated Women’s Month, the arrest of a man who allegedly raped and killed her made headlines across the country. She had simply gone to collect a parcel at the post office when he is said to have attacked her.

Ukzn Howard campus cries against gender based violence 😢💔💔💔#AmINextPROTEST #shutdownsouthafrica#UyineneMrwetyana pic.twitter.com/7wLdggOOT7

— Sisanda Cele (@SisandaCele1) September 3, 2019

@UPTuks Students holding a vigil in response to living in fear. #AmINext #AmINextProtest pic.twitter.com/iGK4ErLm63

— Dianri Wessels (@DianriWessels) September 3, 2019

Every year similar headlines make waves – and as with Mrwetyana’s brutal attack – spark outrage and calls for change and government intervention.

Reeva Steenkamp, Karabo Mokoena, Zolile Khumalo and Siam Lee are just some of the women whose faces permeated our social media and whose tragic deaths, at the hands of their partners, shocked communities to the core.

ALSO READ: Relief for victims as Siam Lee murder accused died

The outrage, however, was short-lived. Soon, only the family was left to mourn, and each year the list of names continues to grow, unabated.

https://twitter.com/EloquentTash/status/1168858437427564544

South Africa’s femicide rate is nearly fives times more than the global average.

AfricaCheck.org confirmed that in South Africa a woman is murdered at least every four hours and half of these women are murdered at the hands of an intimate partner.

It is estimated that one in five women (older than 18) has experienced physical violence, according to a 2017 study conducted by the Centre for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation.

https://twitter.com/Thuli_P/status/1168860478942191616

As shocking as these statistics are they far from accurate, as police believe many incidents go unreported.

ALSO READ: WomensMonth: Alleged Kloof femicide victim’s daughter speaks out

If we hope to see a decrease in gender-based violence we should, as a society, take responsibility. We should stop waiting for the powers that be to ‘do something’.

We should speak up and call out men who are harassing or objectifying our sisters – so that they know their opinions and actions are not welcome.

We should rally around those women; in groups, we can make sure that she is safely escorted to her car or home.

As neighbours, we should report domestic abuse. We should stop turning a blind eye, pretending that it is ‘none of our business’.

According to Stats SA, 3.3 per cent of men and 2.3 per cent of women still believe that men have a right to beat women.

As parents, we should teach our children about body autonomy, and stop forcing them to greet our family and friends with physical displays of affection. We should not sacrifice our children’s comfort to spare grandpa, uncle Joe and even aunt Betty embarrassment when our sons and daughters are not comfortable giving them a hug.

As statistics have shown, victims are more likely to be assaulted by someone they know.

We are teaching our children that other people’s feelings and comfort are more important than their own!

As parents, we should also teach our sons to respect women and that they have no possession over us.

https://twitter.com/MakgolaneTarcia/status/1168876440038846464

https://twitter.com/BecomingDrEdd/status/1168848427830185984

Just cancelled every tinder date I had lined up with a new man this week, because, I'm honestly too petrified. Meeting another woman tonight who seems keen on a lil debriefing session after the news from today. Fuck I think we need a debriefing sesh for all women in SA.

— Saya (like Say-Ja, SayNo, SayMaybe…) (@saya_pj) September 2, 2019

I firmly believe that our daughters should be taught self-defence lessons. We cannot avoid every danger, but we can be as prepared as possible.

ALSO READ: #WomensMonth: Women learn to fight back

On that note, we need to prepare our mothers, sisters, daughters and friends on what to do, should the worst ever happen. We should all know how to preserve evidence, where and how to report sexual assault and where to go for trauma counselling afterwards.

https://twitter.com/Kelbawhom/status/1168809773766234112

Ok so as much as I'm enjoying retweeting my outrage and signing petitions, what real thing can I do to help stop this shit. I have daughters. I want them to be safe.

— Megan (@MamaZombieZA) September 3, 2019

And lastly, as a society, we need to support victims of sexual assault. The prevalence of victim shaming and blaming is silencing our sisters and creating the perfect environment for sexual perpetrators to thrive.

We should reassure our daughters – and our sons as they, too, are victims – that we will believe them and support them, so that they will feel safe enough to talk about and report such incidents.

Our actions can inspire change.

Do you want to receive alerts regarding this and other Highway community news via Telegram? Send us a Telegram message (not an SMS) with your name and surname (ONLY) to 060 532 5409.

You can also join the conversation on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.

PLEASE NOTE: If you have signed up for our news alerts you need to save the Telegram number as a contact to your phone, otherwise you will not receive our alerts.

Here’s where you can download Telegram on Android or Apple.

To receive our free newsletter click here.