Standing up for women

Thirteen years after surviving an abusive relationship, former award-winning journalist Vanessa Govender broke her silence in a gripping book, Beaten but not Broken.

The 41-year old former eTV presenter and SABC news anchor read extracts of her 206-page memoir last week at Vovo Telo at the Ballito Lifestyle Center, which spill the details of physical, emotional and mental torture Govender suffered for more than five years, at the hands of her first boyfriend.

Tearfully reading an extract of the book that recounted a time the man had hit her at the SABC studio, Govender explained that the journey which brought her to reveal the truth about her past was a difficult one, with shame and fear holding her back.

“I had also started a job that was in the public eye and I did not want people to see me in another way aside from that as a strong woman. You read stories almost every day about women who are dying at the hands of the men who say they love them.

“I got tired of keeping this secret and I got tired of protecting a person who did not deserve my protection because that is what my silence did.”

The book comes in the wake of women’s month and despite ongoing campaigns against abuse, South Africa has the highest statistics of intimate partner violence in the world with one woman being killed every eight hours.

Speaking in front of an audience of friends, family and readers, the mother of three said her book was dedicated to the women who were no longer here to tell their stories. She said she hoped that by revealing her pain, more women would speak out without guilt or shame.

“I wrote for the women who are no longer here and for those who remain trapped. I have laid it all bare so there is nothing to diminish anybody with. From premarital sex to violent abuse, it is all there. The permission that women have been waiting for to speak their truth and to own their truth, is here. This is a small fraction but our voices are going to get louder and it is going to get so loud they will not be able to ignore us anymore.”

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