Two Bits – 27 Febraury 2015

Sometimes you get such bad service from a company that all you want to do is badmouth them to anyone who will listen. Even write a letter to the local paper.
I receive more than a few letters every year about poor service, particularly at the many restaurants in our burgeoning area. Did you know there are more than 80 places on the Dolphin Coast, including takeaways, that sell prepared food? It’s unbelievable that they all manage to make a living, but I think there are a few that manage to print money.
Anyhow, I got so many of those letters at one stage that I decided not to print them, just because they were so repetitive. Also because it was a toss-up between informing the public, pandering to a private vendetta (unknown to me) and biting the hand that feeds us, advertising-wise.
After all, if a person sets up in business and then does a bad job of it, they’ll be found out in the long run. Then they’ll go out of business and slink away, to try their hand again somewhere else. But do they deserve to be criticised just for being bad at business? Dishonesty, fraud and theft are a different matter – but is being dof a crime?
I had first-hand experience of really awful service recently. No names, no packdrill, I needed a garage door fitted before Christmas. I had ruined the old one when load shedding left it hanging a few inches (sorry, centimetres, I had inches drummed into me at primary school) low and my roofrack broke it stukkend.
So I called up a company which said yes, yes, they could do the job right away. Just pay the deposit and we’ll be there!
So I paid and they weren’t there. I phoned every day. ‘Yes, yes, we’re coming right away!’ And they weren’t there!
Christmas came and went. They had stopped answering the phone long before. My garage was wide open to any passing lightfingers, but we must be living a charmed life as nothing was pinched (must be all the praying my wife does).
Early January I got a call from a workman who asked if it would be okay if he came round to fit my door? He sounded embarrassed – probably had his ear chewed off a few dozen times! It crossed my mind to say ‘Stick your door!’ but I really wanted a garage door fitted right away, so let it rest. He came, fitted the door and it works like a charm.
A month into the new year and I get a hefty letter from another completely pissed-off customer of the same company. She had had exactly the same experience – paid the deposit, then was ignored until well into January – and was in such a rage her letter could peel paint at twenty paces.
So what do I do? Do I publish her cry of rage or not? I think the company could be accused of being over-eager for business, but of outright dishonesty? They delivered in the end, even if six weeks late. Like I said, do I condemn someone for not being smart?
When I started out in business, I made plenty of mistakes. We’d run advertisements without telephone numbers or addresses or with copy errors. We were also stony broke, so it really hurt to have to forfeit the money. And yes, the first inclination was to make up excuses for failing to deliver the goods. Not our fault, etc etc.
And sometimes it isn’t your fault, but what I did learn was that when it is, own up to it. Nothing will lose you business faster than a customer who believes he/she has been lied to.
Come right out and say “It’s my fault. How can we fix it?” Nine times out of ten that approach will completely mollify an unhappy customer. Even if you give a complete refund, it will earn you more in the long run because that customer will be back and may even speak well of you in that great court of public opinion.
* * *
Gatiep and Karools are sitting on death row.
Gatiep asks the warden, “Does it take long and is it painful?”
Warden says: “No, they just strap you in, flick the switch and it’s over.”
Karools is called in, and moments later Gatiep hears screaming and shouting.
This carries on for quite a while. Gatiep says to the warden: “I thought you said it was quick and painless.”
Warden replies: “Yes – but because of load shedding they now use candles!”