SEDIBENG.- Findings of a two-year study by The Open University in the UK showed that it’s not grand bouquets of flowers and boxes of chocolates that keep love alive, but rather selfless gestures, with a cup of tea being singled out as a significant sign of a partner’s affection.

Researchers interviewed close to 5 000 men and women on how to make love last in the 21^st century.

Thoughtful gifts and generous acts of kindness were described as expressions of love and were not dependent on money or significant dates, such as a birthday or Valentine’s Day. It was rather what the gift or gesture signified that was most important.

Adele du Toit, spokesperson for the SA Rooibos Council (SARC) says one of the most important facets of our lives is having a meaningful and loving relationship with someone we deeply care about.

“In the modern age of technology, when we are communicating more than ever before, real and personal connections seem to be waning. The constant barrage of tweets, texts, and emails has replaced face-to-face interaction. Taking the time to make a cup of tea for our spouse or partner helps to rebuild lost or broken connections while expressing our desire to care for them.

“Sharing a cup of tea with someone is designed to build deeper and more meaningful relationships,” she says. It does so in three ways:

1. Tea provides a mutual experience that can be enjoyed together.
2. It consists of an act of kindness. From carefully measuring out the leaves or tea bags, gently pouring the water into the teapot, and emptying its contents into your finest cups, make your companion feel appreciated. It’s symbolic of how you feel about them.
3. Carving out time to be with your special someone at that moment, also encourages richer conversation.

Du Toit remarks that throughout history, people have turned to herbs to express feelings of love, passion, and romance. Still, in many cultures, herbs like lavender, spearmint, ginger, damiana, chamomile, and lemon balm are celebrated for their romantic powers.