IT’S Father’s Day today in South Africa, which got me to thinking about my late dad and some of the pearls of wisdom he shared with me, some on purpose, others incidentally.
In no particular order, here goes…
DRIVING: He preached defensive driving before the expression became popular and before we’d heard of the traffic guy on East Coast Radio, Johann von Bargen, who died recently. Expect the unexpected, my dad said. “You see that car ahead, the driver may be indicating to turn left but that does not mean he will.” I’d say that is solid advice for SA roads.
MOM: Don’t upset your mother, he cautioned, sort of suggesting indirectly that this was his privilege alone. I have never heard my mother use a swear word or lose her rag. She’s as phlegmatic and unflappable as they come. But when one of us was in the dog box he’d say, ‘uh oh, now your mother is putting her foot down with a firm hand’! This was usually followed by a laugh from dad and a ‘hmmpff’ from mom.
TV: One of the things he got a small kick out of was annoying us kids when we were watching too much TV. He’d come home from work or the golf club and ask: ‘What drivel is this that you are watching?” We’d protest and plead for him to move out of the way. Then he’d say ‘it looks like absolute piffle’ before walking off, a smile at the corner of his mouth. Of course, if it was a Western or James Bond movie (with Sean Connery) he wouldn’t mind!
GOLF: His favourite sport was golf but he felt it should have been called ‘Can You Take It?’ He was extremely competitive and was known to be able to embed a wedge in the ground after a poor shot, to the extent that it would shudder, not unlike when a javelin pegs the turf. “Golf isn’t always fair, much like life,” he explained, “and what’s important is how you deal with it.”
LOVE: As a young man I asked him how to go about choosing the right woman to marry. “My boy,” he said, “I can only tell you what my father told me. Stay away from fast women and slow horses.” When I met my now wife, and realised how much I liked her, I asked her how fast she ran the 100m sprint. ‘Sorry what?’ she said, looking at me like I was mad.
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