For most of her life, Toni-Lee Bekker knew what it meant to fight for survival. Now, following a life-changing kidney transplant, she is finally embracing the freedom to dream, make plans and enjoy the little things many people take for granted.

Diagnosed with lupus at 13, Toni-Lee endured years of medical procedures, hospital admissions and, eventually, three years on dialysis before her brother, Jesse, donated one of his kidneys in January 2024, giving her a second chance at life.

Reflecting on reaching the other side of her medical journey, she said the emotions only truly caught up with her after her final operation.

“For so many years, my focus had been on surviving. I wasn’t thinking too much about the future because I was constantly in a position where I had to protect my health and do whatever was necessary to stay alive.

“Suddenly, I could start thinking about things I had never really allowed myself to imagine – having children, travelling, making plans and looking forward to experiences that previously felt so far out of reach.

“It was overwhelming in the most wonderful way. I remember crying because I couldn’t quite believe that I was finally able to look at life differently.”

Her diagnosis at 13 turned what had been a relatively normal childhood into a battle she was perhaps too young to understand.

“Before my diagnosis, I was living a relatively normal childhood. I enjoyed sports, being active and simply being a child. Then, almost overnight, my life changed completely. I entered a world of hospitals, medical procedures and surgeries.

“At 13, how do you even begin to understand something that many adults would struggle to process? I don’t think I fully understood what was happening. I think I simply accepted that I had to listen to my doctors and keep going.”

Despite the challenges, she found ways to remain positive, crediting her mother for standing beside her throughout the journey.

Lupus eventually affected her kidneys, leading to three particularly difficult years on dialysis.

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“People don’t always realise just how much dialysis changes your everyday life. Even something as simple as having a cold drink becomes a decision as to whether it’s worth it or not.

“You can’t simply decide to go away on holiday for a week. You have to plan around dialysis centres and make sure you are somewhere you can receive treatment. Your life becomes organised around a medical routine.”

The experience also brought serious complications, including a pulmonary embolism following a blood clot caused by a dialysis catheter.

However, hope arrived through an unexpected phone call from her brother.

“Jesse’s decision to donate his kidney changed my life in almost every possible way. What makes his decision even more special is how naturally it came to him.

“He has his own family, responsibilities and a very active lifestyle. Yet, when he realised he could help me, his response was essentially, ‘You’re wasting time. Let’s test. I’ll donate you a kidney.’”

For Toni-Lee, the donation meant more than receiving a new kidney. It meant having someone beside her through a battle she had often felt she was fighting alone.

“He gave me a second chance at life and, more than that, the opportunity to find the sweetness in life again.

“He is my big brother, my personal hero and someone I will always look up to. I honestly didn’t think I could love or respect him more than I already did.”

She hopes their experience will encourage others to consider living kidney donation, highlighting how Jesse continues to play competitive rugby, do CrossFit, run his business and raise his family.

Meanwhile, the support from the Benoni community has also left a lasting impression.

“It feels like more than simply living in a community. In a way, it feels like having an extended family. These are people who don’t necessarily know us, but they genuinely want to know how we are doing. They have no personal agenda. They simply care.”

Freedom has now taken on an entirely different meaning.

“It means being able to dream, look forward to things and feel that life isn’t constantly restricted by your health. It means being able to play in the mud with Jesse’s children, get dirty, laugh and enjoy those ordinary moments that so many people take for granted.

“After spending so long without that sense of freedom, experiencing it again is incredible. It has reminded me just how precious the opportunity to live a normal, fulfilling life really is.”

Her message to those who have followed her family’s journey is simple.

“To everyone who has followed our journey through the Benoni City Times, shown an interest and taken the time to find out how we’re doing, I want to say a heartfelt thank you. It means more than you probably realise. Honestly, I have a love for you all.”

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