The Martin’s recipe for a long and happy marriage

A STRONG foundation in the Lord, never taking things for granted, gratitude and love, are all the ingredients that have gone into the recipe for a successful, happy marriage for Desmond and Marie-Olga Martin.

The couple, who live in Bartle Road MOTH Cottages, will celebrate 60 years of marriage on 16 July, with their family living locally.

In 1954, Des invited Marie-Olga's friend, France, to the St Patrick's Ball, but as she had another engagement, he suggested that perhaps her friend would go with him.

“Upon France phoning me, I declined, saying he and his brothers were all alter servers and smelt of incense! France said she wasn't asking me to marry him, just to go out with him, so after much hesitation, I said I'd go if he phoned me personally and took me out for tea first, as blind dates were frowned upon in those days,” said Marie-Olga.

Their first date started disastrously as Des's friend's car had a puncture, and as there was no telephone for miles, when he finally pitched up at Marie-Olga's house an hour later, she was in bed and told her friend to tell him to get lost!

“My friend Maxine pleaded with me for a while and said he seemed like a decent chap and that it wasn't his fault he was late. So I reluctantly got up and dressed and yes, had a lovely evening! I didn't hear from him until Easter when he took me out for tea on Good Friday. I wasn't over friendly though! We later went to an office party in Amanzimtoti and as it was cold, he put his arm around me in the car and I fell asleep on his shoulder. After that, we went out a lot,” she said.

The couple were married with nuptial mass at the Durban Emmanuel Cathedral on 16 July 1955.

The first year of their married life was spent at Enyati Colliery, north of Vryheid, as Des went to work on the mines, but with the coal dust and heavy mists, Marie-Olga suffered frequent asthma attacks, so they returned to Durban.

Their oldest child, Matthew, was born in October 1956 and three years later Paul was born. Mary was born in 1963, and the baby, Ann, has just turned 50.

The couple have seven grandchildren and one great-grandchild. Their first grandchild, Louise, died just before her second birthday, and her 21-year-old brother Merron, died saving his co-pilot instructor when he rescued him from a burning helicopter.

Des has had a lifelong interest in the Comrades Marathon and after several years acting as a marshal, he eventually decided to run the race. He entered 20 Comrades, completed 15 and holds in perpetuity number 23, which was the number of the first Comrades winner, Bill Rowan, in 1921.

Marie-Olga worked five years, part time, in the Red Cross. For the first 16 years of married life she stayed at home, and only when Ann started school did she take on a half-day job.

“For about 20 years I taught catechism and did work for Tape Aids for the Blind for 21 years. When I was 68 I went for French lessons so I could teach the blind at the Worcester School. I spoke French, as both my parents were from Mauritius, but did not have enough practise. I also had 30 enjoyable years in the Women's Institute at Bellhaven,” she said.

She runs a Thursday social group and is a member of the Catholic Women's League and represents Assumption Catholic Church in the Umbilo Christian Women's Unity Group. She also enjoys selling flowers at Stellawood Cemetery once a month and is active and supports her husband's Shellhole, BYNG Boys.

The couple spent about three years in the Historical Society and saw quite a bit of Natal. They also enjoy doing crosswords and cryptics together and spend time together in prayer.

Speaking about her husband, Marie-Olga said he was very patient, trusting and loving and always treated her like a lady.

Des said: “I have had two strokes and am very blessed to have gotten away lightly. I can still walk and talk and my mind is active. I thank Marie-Olga for 60 years of marriage and for putting up with all my quirks and for being there for me.”