LOOKING at her two beautiful children, Pearl Holdstock who struggled with infertility said it reminds her daily how much she wanted them, the pain she went through to have them and most importantly the joy they have brought into her life.

She and her husband, Heino, started this year with the publishing of their journal, Victory over infertility, a tool which they have created for couples battling with infertility.

“It’s an interactive devotional for couples to write their emotions, understand the fertility process and the ovulation process. Take accountability about what they eat and learn to support and share in each other’s pain during the waiting period!”

Asked about the myths regarding infertility, she said fertility issues do not only affect women, but men as well.

Also read: Mrs SA semi-finalist defies all odds

“In order for a child to be born the child needs both parents’ chromosomes. If one of the parents has fertility problems the child cannot be born. Society tend to put the focus on women when it comes to infertility.”

She mentioned that other myths include that stress causes infertility.

“Stress makes it difficult to conceive but not the underlying factor of infertility. There are also beliefs that when the woman is over 35 or man is over 50 chances of conceiving a child are less. This may be true but infertility affects women and men below the age of 30,” explained the mother of two.

The couple discovered that Pearl had fertility issues one year after getting married.

“Many couples are advised to only start seeking help after a year of unsuccessful trying to conceive and in my opinion couples must seek help sooner, even before marriage, particularly if one of them has had a history with surgeries.”

At first, she said she tried everything in her power to get pregnant and stay pregnant but eventually she started to feel overwhelmed, emotional and depressed.

“I did everything there was to do but nothing happened.”

Their biggest challenges were multiple, big and painful cysts and fibroids and excessive pain during Pearl’s cycle.

After multiple fertility treatments, the Holdstocks were told they can never conceive on their own.

After trying with no success, the Pinetown resident said she let go and began to trust in the Lord wholeheartedly.

Also read: Pearl spreads message of hope

“I spoke positive words towards my womb. I declared the word of God towards our marriage and God honoured his words. Nine years later our healthy boy was born and we were again blessed with a daughter, two years after the birth of our first born.”

The book was inspired by the work they do with thousands of couples across the country battling infertility.

“Most of them are dealing with depression, separation and infertility because one partner is infertile. South African couples are not supported enough when they face infertility, there is no help available for people who can’t access fertility treatment because of finances.

“There is no counselling for men and women who battle with infertility and end up not having kids. There are no free remedies available other than birth control to regulate hormones. The inspiration behind it is we are advocating for families battling a condition they didn’t choose but the condition chose them.”

She advised couples to take accountability about what they eat and learn to support and share in each other’s pain during the waiting period!

“I would also advise couples to seek help/counselling because infertility affects one’s mental well-being. They can also get in touch with us as we have a ministry dedicated to helping with different kinds of infertility.”

The book costs R200 and to get a copy, visit https://www.perfectlyhealthy.co.za/products/premium-female-fertility-tonic. The first 50 people will get it for free.

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