Two Bits – 13 November 2015

When we started the North Coast Courier, 30 years ago this month, we printed 7000 copies of an eight-page paper every fortnight.
Due to the rapid growth in population this year, brought about by the influx of mainly young families to the fastest growing area of the province if not the country, this week the print order is to be raised from 35 000 copies to 40 000 copies a week. The Courier is the largest newspaper distributed in the Ilembe district.
The first editions used to fit into a very tightly packed VW Beetle with the passenger seat removed, plus a baby cot perched on the back seat, on the occasions that the bakkie was broken and Rose had to go to the printer.
Thirty years later a 40-pager plus a dozen or so inserts amounts to 1 600 bundles, which together with inserts can weigh in at a staggering 20 tons. You can develop really awesome biceps, core strength, whatever, hurling 20 tons around!
Forget Boot Camp, join my driver on his delivery route from Umdloti to Mandeni and all you have to do is carry 1 600 bundles of 12.5kg each from the truck into a shop, go back to the truck, move down the street and repeat. All this is done at a run so the traffic cops don’t hassle the driver for double parking. No, actually I made that last part up. That was years ago. Nobody cares about double parking anymore.
So we’ve grown from 16 black and white pages a month in 1985/86, to an average 185 colour pages a month in 2015. That’s an awful lot of information about the goings-on between Umdloti and the Tugela, wouldn’t you agree? Rose and I are very proud to be at the helm of the oldest and largest paper on the Dolphin Coast, but we wouldn’t be here without simply the best team ever!
Our extremely popular Get It magazine is now in its 10th year and with a print run of 20 000 copies, is the largest local magazine. In the capable hands of editor Leah Shone, the mag just keeps getting better and better. The Get It Kids issues – four a year – is a winner with parents and children alike.
Finally, our bi-annual Fast Finder service directory is tops. The December issue, which is on the drawing boards right now, will be the fattest to date at 108 pages. Your local guide for anything from Air-conditioning to Physiotherapists to Zumba classes, all in a handy booklet. Look out for it early December.

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Straight out of business school, the young man answered an ad for an accountant.
Now he was being interviewed by a very nervous man who ran a small business that he had started himself.
“I need someone with an accounting degree,” the man said. “But mainly, I’m looking for someone to do my worrying for me.”
“Excuse me?” the accountant said.
“I worry about a lot of things,” the man said. “But I don’t want to have to worry about money. Your job will be to take all the money worries off my back.”
“I see,” the accountant said. “And how much does the job pay?”
“I’ll start you at R50 000.”
“R50 000!” the accountant exclaimed. “How can such a small business afford a sum like that?”
“That,” the owner said, “is your first worry.”