Dear esteemed keepers of the KZN Asphalt Kingdom.

Due to my dramatic dispatch about a moody teenage pothole near the Tinley Manor off-ramp sent across KZN on June 12, I’m thrilled to report: My mail was received!

Warm greetings once again from your resident pothole poet, warrior of wheel alignment and self-appointed guardian of black rubber sanity.

Let me begin with heartfelt thanks for the dramatic surgery performed on the once-rebellious pothole. She’s recovering and being monitored to see how she handles the daily pounding of various black rubber sizes. It’s cautiously optimistic… like a middle-aged man trying salsa after knee surgery.

However – cue the dramatic drumroll – a distant family member in the pothole genealogy is still suffering. Meet Cousin Krater, the black sheep of the tar clan on the Tinley Manor/Palm Lakes offramp. He’s been neglected, avoided and emotionally abandoned by every passing vehicle.

His condition has grown septic. Even the mighty taxis, those fearless off-road ninjas, are side eyeing him and swerving like he’s a pothole version of Sars. This isn’t just a pothole: It’s a community crisis. We’re talking moral decay of the roadways.

Should we amend the K53 Learner’s Guide to include a chapter called “Advanced Pothole Evasion: Zigzag Your Way to Success?” How are traffic cops going to pass or fail to assess learners during their driving tests when the road is one giant booby trap?

We’ve entered an era where our roads have become less like reliable infrastructure and more like a choose-your-own-adventure novel, where the ending is usually, “RIP tyre. Axle broken. Alignment, what alignment?”

So, I ask again, with a passionate plea and a tiny bit of dramatic flair: If cars must be roadworthy, shouldn’t roads be car-worthy?

Let’s stop swerving away from this issue. I’m calling on government, civic organisations and every community upliftment hero out there – assemble like the Asphalt Avengers!

Let’s patch up these pockmarked paths, not with broken promises and asphalt Band-Aids, but with solid, loving and long-term road rehabilitation; let’s reclaim our roads!

P.S. If Cousin Krater could cry, we’d be waist-deep in pothole tears. He’s out there now, alone, septic and sobbing in the cold winter wind. Let’s not drown in regret… or axle grease.

Stay in the loop with The North Coast Courier on Facebook, X, Instagram & YouTube for the latest news.

Mobile users can join our WhatsApp Broadcast Service here or if you’re on desktop, scan the QR code below.