Latecomer excuses worsen with time

If you want to hear true creativity, ask an employee why they are late for work. When faced with the very real possibility of a warning, disciplinary or just plain old getting chewed out by the boss, some bring out their best excuses as a defence.

After all, isn’t the best defence a good offence? However, many push the bounds of logic when quickly fabricating a crafty counter to the phrase ‘You are late… Again!”

Here are a few of the funniest and lamest excuses found on the Internet:

· My heating was switched off so I had to stay home to keep my snake warm.

· My husband thinks it’s funny to hide my car keys before he goes to work.

· I walked into a spider web on the way out and I couldn’t find the spider, so I had to go inside and shower again.

· My left turn signal was out so I had to make all right turns to get here.

· I was attacked by a raccoon and had to stop by the hospital to make sure it wasn’t rabid.

· I feel like I am in everyone’s way if I show up on time.

· My father didn’t wake me up.

· A groundhog bit my tyre and made it flat.

· My driveway washed away in the rain last night.

· I had to go to bingo.

· My car wouldn’t start because the breathalyser showed I was intoxicated.

· I left the apartment with my roommate’s girlfriend’s shoes on, so I had to go back and change.

· My wife was angry with me and froze the car keys in a glass of water in the freezer.

· I tried to cut my own hair before work but the clippers stopped working, so I had to wait for the barber’s shop to open to get a decent cut.

· My car was attacked by a bear (this one actually had photographic evidence).

· I had to stop and help deliver a stranger’s baby on the side of the highway.

· I’m sorry I was late. I went to my previous job by mistake.

Are you not amused? Yet there is also an important lesson to be learned for those who believe making an excuse for tardiness is acceptable.

According to Ivan Israelstam, an expert in the field of labour law, employers need to address late-coming with firm, swift, fair and progressive measures. His advice is to never turn a blind eye to late-comers and then fire the offender, nor to give warnings and not act.

A general rule of thumb is that an employee should be at their desk, working by the agreed-upon starting time. Even if you are at work, but are making coffee and booting up the computer – you are still late.

How many of the above excuses have you used? Leave your comments below!