‘Those who hurt, hurt others’ – Rakgadi
Rakgadi Thulas is a married mother of one who is a founding member of the Women Taking Back Safety Organisation.
“The struggles of a single black mother are unusually hidden from the community because we have the urge to make things happen for our children without realising we are only enclosing them into a vicious cycle of anger and hatred.”
These are the words of Thulamsindo Rapotu, more affectionally known as Rakgadi Thulas, after tongues were wagging in the community of Flora Park after a mother was caught on video, refusing the police entry by blocking the road with her cars when her son was accused to stealing.
Rakgadi Thulas is a married mother of one who is a founding member of the Women Taking Back Safety Organisation, among other titles, living in Flora Park and who has dedicated her retirement from public service to helping those in her community and surrounding areas.
Rakgadi Thulas says this was a prime example of how the community never knows the extent a mother will go to protect her children, especially if they are being raised under the backdrop of a broken family.
“Growing up, I quickly noticed that most of our sisters were never married and very often had children at more than one man. When you have to raise the children of a man who left you, it is normal to feel betrayed and if you do not deal with it, you might end up resenting your children or feel no desire to spend time with them or raise them. The broken family will always leave elements of anger because you are hurting and then you end up hurting the children in return, who end up drunkards and drug addicts that will never love their children.”
She highlighted the need to self introspect, saying most mothers do not even realise the harsh tone they use towards their children and if you do not properly heal you will be prone to every trigger.
“It is high time we go back to basics as mothers, as that connection between mother and child is important and very often we end up neglecting our roles in the name of nannies or work.
The first step to remedy the situation is acknowledgement, and then acceptance which needs to come with changing your mindset.”
She emphasised the need to exist within the community, saying when she grew up the saying ‘it takes a village to raise a child’ was not just a saying but a mantra that was lived.
