Give a Child a Family: Until I’m old and grey, there will always be children in my yard…
...because I still believe all children need to belong.
I had children and I had never thought of adopting or fostering before, until one day I heard the story of how some children grew up in orphanages and child centres and never get to have mothers or a family, and that broke my heart. Sure some of these places treat the children well, but I believe every child should at least have a mother and a place to call home. That is what made me decide to foster a child when I heard of Give a Child a Family. I couldn’t believe any child can be completely happy without feeling as if they belong.
At the time I didn’t even know about the grant for the children. That was an extra blessing. If I had the strength I wouldn’t take the money at all. Sometimes I fear that the money could one day tarnish our love.
I would never want my daughter to think there was even a remote possibility that this was about the money.
My daughter is a daughter like any other. We fight sometimes, we love sometimes. She is just like all other children. It has been a great source of amusement to us the way everyone thinks she looks just like the rest of the family. It must be God. If you saw her, you would never know that she wasn’t a biological member of this family. She even looks like my other children.
I have learnt a lot through this journey. The biggest thing though is discipline. We grew up knowing that discipline is hitting. Before she came, I was struggling with discipline. No matter how much I hit my children they still misbehaved and it seemed to be getting worse.
Through the foster parent trainings we learnt about the difference between punishment and discipline – about withholding their favourite things sometimes as a consequence.
I never knew you should let your child make the choice between doing right or wrong. It made such a difference in our lives when I started applying everything that I was learning. Now my house is a hit-free zone and instead we talk about things, but there are always consequences, whether you do right or wrong.
My child is very introverted. She prefers to stay at home with mom rather than to go gallivanting with other children. I try not to have favourites, but it’s not easy. Not because of where I got her from, but because she is always by my side, more so than the others.
Our whole family life has definitely improved. My relationship with my other children is thriving. She is not always like a child – she seems to be an old soul. Sometimes she is like a sister. I can talk to her about the real stuff. Not because she is from “Give a Child a Family”, but because of her personality and who she is.
I find it so funny that I fostered a child because I felt sorry for them, but instead it improved my life in so many ways.
My home will always be open. I don’t think she will be the only child I ever foster. Once they are grown and if I am still able, I will foster more children. In fact, until I’m old and grey there will always be children in my yard because I still believe all children need to belong.
My house will never die too! Imagine when I’m dead and all these children that I’m raising as brothers and sisters will still love each other and keep the light shining in this house!
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Give a Child a Family’s (GCF) passion for over 25 years has been to ensure that children are placed in secure families, as that’s where they belong. Developing a programme in an African context for foster and family care has been tested and proven in 12 different countries on the continent. Ensuring that families are properly screened, trained and ready to receive a child is of utmost importance, and thereafter placed in support groups for follow-up work.
This programme can be rolled out for the greater good of children where there is a desire to impact families and communities for better living. There are many challenges facing families and communities but empowering and developing resilience through learning is a key that opens the door to overcoming these challenges and enabling communities to take ownership of their circumstances and turn creating change.
We believe that #ChildrensLivesMatter and GCF burns with passion and compassion to see a strong and empowered Africa to effectively care for its children and families, as communities are still reeling from the impact of HIV, poverty and a basket of social ills resulting in the break-up of family units.
- As we forge forward, our programmes will focus increasingly on preventative and early intervention, with building parenting skills, emotional trauma work, healthy living and socio-economic capacity of families.
- Protective behaviours, and rights and responsibilities for children, ensuring self-help for children.
- Social Justice is promoted to faith-based organisations, school educators, municipal leaders and organisations.
- De-institutionalisation is part of the strategy to ensure that children do not grow up in institutions but rather in families in the community.
GCF recognizes the role-players and other stakeholders in partnering with all the professionals in providing training and support – to achieve a strong informal child protection system and to fulfil our vision of CHILDREN IN SECURE FAMILIES, BECAUSE IT’S WHERE THEY BELONG.
ARTICLE SPONSORED BY CHANTEL ELLIOTT & CO
TEL: 039 315 0500
LOT 702 REVEILLE ROAD, SHELLY BEACH
WEBSITE: CHANTEL ELLIOTT & CO
