I saw a fork-tailed drongo kill a tawny-flanked prinia in my garden the other day. You can’t un-see something like that.
The shiny black behemoth with deep red eyes was sitting on the fence when it suddenly dived into the grass among a flock of tiny brown prinias.
It grabbed one in its claws, ripping into it before it flew off to enjoy its disgusting meal.
I gawked for a few moments, in awe of the gruesome encounter between the two feathered creatures.
The unsuspecting little bird was pecking in the grass, and then it wasn’t.
I was carrying a happy bundle to share with the world and then the pandemic came and ended my community mothering reality, too.
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I felt alone and attacked. It felt unfair and it still hasn’t begun to feel normal more than a year onwards.
My bouncing baby boy is now an adventurous toddler.
Like a little prinia, exploring his surroundings with loud exclamations of delight or a shriek at a passing bunny hopping into sight.
If he’s lucky enough to escape the throes of the pandemic and venture out into wider circles, he’ll still have to contend with sudden changes that may want to make him dive for cover.
He’s friendly but there aren’t a lot of strangers in his life right now.
He’s calm and confident, but we’ve never been to a mall, church, or playgroup with him.
He’s learning to interact with a spirited older brother, but there are two parents who intervene here, shielding him from snatching and all those fun little people problems.
Will my little prinias be able to escape the drongos masquerading as fellow foragers?
Oprah’s latest book is incredibly interesting as a handbook on childhood trauma and its effects on adulthood.
The brain is apparently malleable, and keeping it regulated is the key to keeping the rational thought and higher cortex functioning.
Stress, anger, and uncertainty shuts all that down, especially if the brain recognises some prior trauma signal or interprets a trigger as a threat.
The brain also needs challenges to develop but it can’t be an impossible task, just something that stretches it enough to show it that it has potential.
What will my two tiny boys think about masks, crowds, sanitizer, and handshakes one day?
Will it trigger them into unsure, fearful little people as they’re going about their jobs or grocery shopping with their own children one day? I hope not.
If adults can find ways to regulate themselves under enormous pressure, the children will learn how to do it, as well.
We can be happy prinias with a practiced eye and a strategy for life’s drongos.
The children can survive this and so can we. Maybe we should think of Covid as just another drongo challenge, stretching us into thriving people who appreciate the sunshine.
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