Joanna Stephenson and her husband Adrian are from Pennington, and they lead an interesting and diverse family life – they have two autistic sons.
Joanna has written something aimed at other parents who have autistic children. Contact her on 076 6796679.
As a mom of two autistic boys, now 17 and 19 years of age, Joanna swears by the following do’s and don’ts that will not only make the parent’s life easier and less stressful, but more importantly help the unique child feel safe, secure, understood and comfortable in their own world. They’re not just wired differently, it’s a whole new operating system.
We all know Android and Apple… they’re neither. They cannot manage in our world, so you have to step into theirs. Let them be – don’t force them into situations that you know they cannot handle; repetition won’t change the result.
Acceptance is key as they are never going to be our version of normal. If your child can’t stand to be touched, hugged, kissed, it’s because it feels like 1000 sharp needles not because they don’t love you. Autism is not an excuse for bad behaviour. An autistic meltdown and a normal child temper tantrum are two very different things.
Find your calm and patience bubble when getting your child through a meltdown. When you get frustrated remember it’s ten times more frustrating and chaotic in your child’s head.
If your child is non-verbal come up with your own sign, body and noise language that they can relate to. Stop worrying about what they can’t do, but focus and encourage what they can. They’re not social people and more than likely never will be and that’s okay as they generally prefer their own company.
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Make their room their safe place where they’re allowed to retreat to when it gets too much. Fussy eating/fussy eater is not the same as an autistic child who can only manage a few food types.
Stop stressing, give them what they can eat and supplement with meal replacement shakes and vitamins. Routine, routine, routine – try not to waver. Prepare, prepare, prepare if routine is going to change.
For this mum having two autistic boys, it is more heartbreaking then hard as I know their constant battle, but over all these years, I’ve learnt that with acceptance and understanding you can make a positive impact in their lives.
Save the dates for the following events:
Join the chess class at Relton Hall, Pennington on Fridays from 15:00 to 17:00. Cost is R10 per participant. Contact Silvano Borea for further information on 081 0449342.
Table tennis is also happening at Relton Hall, contact Silvano Borea on 081 0449342.
Khanya Hospice would like to have a One Day Care Givers Course as a fundraiser and is looking for a sponsor. They have to do the printing, compiling of notes, printing of certificates, teas and coffees and something to eat for tea time, lunch and afternoon tea for about 15 people.
Sponsorship is sought for this education and training session. They would charge R500 per person to generate money. Can you help? Please contact Neil McDonald on 083 5978985.
Dean Spooner from The Range (golf range) and Mark Holing owner of Bushy Tail decided that some of the proceeds from the Monster Market hosted by Pennington Pre-Primary School this Saturday at 09:00 at The Range will be shared and donated to hospice for the community work that they are doing in the area.
There will be a children’s spookiest or sweetest dress-up competition. A R20 entry free includes a goodie bag. The day will include live music with a DJ, stalls, jumping castle, raffles, skydivers and Grade R Entrepreneur. For stall bookings contact Kath Rand on 082 6145435 or Claire Crookes on 082 6147416.
A reminder about the charity arts and craft exhibition at Casa Mia, 24st Catherine Street Widenham, Umkomaas, also this Saturday from 10:00.
Light refreshments will be available. Interested people can call 039 9732170 to make arrangements or book a space.
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