Parenting 101

Helping children to cope with stress
Often as parents, we find it stressful to keep my children balanced in today’s chaotic times. Balancing extra murals with, tests, exams and day-to-day homework, in between working and running a household is overwhelming for many parents. Imagine how this must feel for your child.

Anxiety and stress is common in children of today’s times. How can you help your child cope with anxiety and stress?
• Tell your child that it is ok to be imperfect
Often as parents, we expect our children to excel in not only the academic side of school but also to perform on the sports fields. It is important to make sure that your child knows that his/her best makes you proud. It is important to encourage your child to work hard, however, one should remember that it is equally important to accept and embrace the fact that no one is perfect. This is an ongoing lesson for parents as well as children.
• Find the positive
Children naturally bleed towards their negative thoughts and self-criticism. The more that a parent focuses on a child’s positive attributes and good aspects the more the child will bend towards an attitude of ‘a glass half full rather than a glass half empty’. Try and help your child focus on what is happening in the ‘here and now’ phase of life, rather than worrying about what may come.
• Bedtime routines
Good sleeping patterns are imperative for children. Make sure that your child has a period of 30 to 45 minutes ‘wind down time’ as part of their bed time routine. This may comprise of bedtime stories, catching up on the day’s activities and praying together at bedtime. Try to avoid any screen time before your child climbs into bed. This will help your child get into the relaxed state of mind needed to fall asleep.
• Listen to understand
“Mom, I’m worried…” By answering with “you’re fine” or “no you’re not” you are likely to make your child feel unheard or misunderstood. Rather use phrases to provoke conversation such as “yes, what is worrying you” or “yes, what is on your mind?” Never be afraid to discuss your child’s emotions and feelings. Ultimately this makes them feel that their feelings and concerns are important to you.
• Parents – ‘CHILLAX’
The first thing a young child does when he/she falls is look to mom or dad. A child’s reaction will depend on the parent’s reaction. Children of all ages tend to look at the way parents react to situations and resonate with the parent’s emotions. If a parent is anxious, a child will feel this anxiety and amplify it. One way to help reduce a child’s anxiety is for parents to try to manage their own anxiety.
• Never give up
Anxiety and stress can often cause a child to feel like they are constantly fighting battles and not getting anywhere. It is important to let your child know that they are not alone and that they
have “what it takes” to achieve their goals. Not everyone gets it
the first-time round.
Keep trying and reach for your dreams.
Being a parent is one of the
hardest but most rewarding
jobs known to mankind,
but ultimately, we want to boost our children’s self-esteem and help them to be the best them that they can be. Know that no matter what, you are doing the best you can for your child and it is always good enough! Keep going!

