It is time to hold parents accountable for bullying

When a video of a girl being bullied by a group of girls surfaced – and her subsequent death – we expressed outrage.

The uproar was undeniable and we were united in saying that those who had a hand in it must be punished.

Then the conversation swirled around about what we would do if we were to find out our children were being bullied.

Yet, we have not heard anyone speak of what they would say or do if their children were the bullies. The children who have through the years been identified as bullies are not orphans.

They often have parents and families.

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When do we own up to the responsibility that our children are far more than the angelic faces we see? To others, they may be the reason they cannot go to school or public spaces.

We shout that they be punished but, as parents, why are we not held accountable?

Behaviours are an extension of parenting abilities.

Do we remain in contact with schools? Are we active and present parents? We must refuse to let them slip beyond our observations and possible interventions.

While not every child is a miniature version of those that raise them – they are the products of the homes and environments that they grow up in.

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They are the extensions of homes with either no rules or rules that guide them. We may be livid at the children that perpetuate these crimes but after our anger subsides, do we ask ourselves where are their parents?

While we cannot account for our children’s every move and decision, how we perceive their behaviour informs what they think they can get away with.

We must refuse to allow our children to be the reason for unhappiness and apparent lawlessness where they walk.

Beyond anything, as a parent, we must be accountable in part for the behaviour of our children.

Within our homes, the consequences thereof must be the reason they conduct themselves in such a manner that other people will never have to recover from their acts.

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We demonise the children we saw on camera attacking a lone girl.

But the brave ask: from what sort of home does this aggressive behaviour come from?

This is an unpopular opinion that we do not want to continuously probe into.

While we prepare our children to never tolerate being bullied, we are never ready to accept that our children can be the bullies – unless they are ready to face the full might of the law.