Humour in court – 50 years ago

Madam – HUMOUR IN COURT – 50 YEARS AGO

BY Imker Botha

In 1965 Newcastle was a relatively small country town. There were only three firms of attorneys namely, Anderson and Edmonds, MB Shaw and Kloppers and MJ Van Lingen and Company.

The original Courthouse still exists and to this day serves as the Magistrate’s Court. Save and except for the Regional Court, which was built a few years later nothing of the old building has changed.

The Chief Magistrate was an elderly gentleman, Vic Van Rensburg who was assisted by an additional Magistrate, Ben Smit. One Prosecutor managed the Criminal Court. He was often assisted by a police sergeant when the roll was too full.

Mr Van Rensburg had an artificial leg and because the offices were not very busy you could clearly hear the old man walking down the corridor, tick tock, tick tock. He was a very dignified and able official.

The tradition was to have a small function in A court just before Christmas when the firms of attorneys closed down until early January.

Each of the firms of attorneys would make a contribution towards the liquor refreshments. These consisted of no more than a bottle of White Horse Whiskey, Oude Meester Brandy and Mainstay Cane Spirits. All 3 of the bottles were neatly exhibited on the Prosecutor’s table. The Castle and Lion Lager Beers together with a few Cokes and Soda Waters were kept in a large sink bath carried into the Court room from the Police Station by two prisoners who were under guard. It was placed in the corner leading to the Prosecutor’s Office.

At approximately half past four those who were associated with the Department of Justice and Legal Fraternity would arrive. It was an all-male party, consisting of the Magistrates, Prosecutor, Chief of Police, Chief Prison Warder, District Surgeon plus the attorneys and two article clerks. The writer was part of the latter rank, being articled to an attorney Monty Crook – a fiery Irishman, but honest and straight as the day was long.

Malcolm Best Shaw was the most senior attorney on this occasion. He sat alone on the edge of the Court table, whilst sipping a beer and contemplating whether he should divorce wife number five and re-marry wife number three.

Van Lingen was a huge man sharing a joke with Skippy Fleming, the Messenger of the Court and Deputy Sheriff. Fleming, with his large hands was hiding the glass containing the generous brandy he had poured himself, in case his wife should suddenly appear on the scene.

Hennie Kloppers was involved in a secret whisper with his fellow Broeder, Nic Botes a police Sergeant, who often assisted the Prosecutor.

The Chief Prison Warder Toddy Greene sat quietly next to Oom Paul Rheeder, who was in his early eighties and who at the time was the Court Orderly. Oom Paul was a Detective Sergeant in his day and he very vividly related to us how he arrested the serial killer, known as the Loskop Murderer who operated in the Estcourt area during the late 1930s.

Those of us who were bachelors enjoyed the luxury of a few beers and the only snacks available – crème crackers with marmite. Hurriedly prepared by the Clerk of the Court at four o’ clock that afternoon. Some of the crème crackers were broken and others only had marmite on them with no butter.

Not everybody was on speaking terms so you selected your drinking mate for the occasion.

The Chief of Police was a portly short Colonel. Judging by the ruddy complexion he must have had a few before arriving at the party. Needless to say the meniscus of the bottle of brandy dropped rapidly while he was around.

Party politics played an ugly role in the community at the time. Present at the gathering was the District Surgeon and leader of the Nationalist Party, Doctor Paul Viljoen. He was surprisingly involved in a conversation with Monty Crook, who was the leader of the United Party at the time.

Viljoen was fond of his Brandy and Coke and Crook was a beer drinker. Not one of these two gentlemen had time for each other. Viljoen would refer to Monty Crook as “’n Boerehater” and the latter always referred to Viljoen as “that complete ass”. (In private conversation of course.)

Surprisingly on this occasion they got on well. Maybe the “Christmas Spirits” diluted their animosity.

I elected to join these two gentlemen because I expected a very interesting conversation to ensue, knowing the atmosphere that prevailed.

Monty Crook asked Paul Viljoen whether his political activities ever affected his medical practice adversely. Very self-assuredly he said “No” and stated that forty percent of his practice consisted of English speaking patients.

Paul Viljoen took a puff at his Lexington cigarette and asked Crook whether his political activities affected his legal practice adversely. Immediately came the answer “No Paul, as matter of fact eighty percent of my criminal practice are Nationalists.”