Perhaps the strangest and most insidious aspect of the disease of alcoholism is its ability to hide itself from the sufferer. Alcoholics are experts at not seeing their own illness. They are often the last to admit that they have a drinking problem.
If the illness is so hard for the alcoholic to recognise, how can you tell whether or not you are an alcoholic? What is the measuring stick of alcoholism? Drinking in the morning? Drinking alone? How much you drink? Not necessarily any of these.
The test is not when you drink, or with whom, or how much, or where, or what (alcohol is alcohol regardless of what it’s flavored or diluted with), or even why you drink.
The real measure is in the answers to these questions:
What has drinking done to you? How does your drinking affect your family, your home, your job or school work, your social life, your physical well-being, your inner emotions? Trouble in any one of these areas suggests the possibility of alcoholism.
It need not be devastating trouble at first. Some alcoholics start out as social drinkers, enjoying a large capacity for liquor and literally “feeling no pain.” Others experience typical alcoholic symptoms from the very beginning. If you are “functioning” – as a housewife, student, working women, etc. – and covering up the effects of your drinking, ask yourself: How much effort, how much sheer willpower is involved in the cover-up?
Is the effect worth the effort? Is there any real fun left? Alcoholism is a progressive illness. Late starting or early, the drinking gets more and more out of control.
Indeed, the very attempt to control it can become an all-consuming preoccupation. Drinking only wine or beer, promising oneself to drink only on weekends, spacing drinks; these are only a few of the methods devised by to try to control their alcohol intake.
Such “white knuckled” ruses are themselves as classic a symptom of alcoholism as the shattering hangover or the frightening blackout.
The AA Estcourt branch hosts meetings every Tuesday at Forderville Primary School from 7pm to 8pm. Contact Desigan on 082 849 3014.
