Signs that someone you care about is drinking too much can be hard to spot if you don’t know what to look out for. It’s obvious when your friend or family member appears visibly drunk or they drink large amounts of alcohol in short spells. As someone close to them, you may be better placed to recognise their change in behaviour.
Spotting the signs
The best approach is with sensitivity and empathy. Think about how you would want to be approached if someone were to tell you that you had a problem with alcohol.
It can be humiliating to be told they may be drinking too much and their first response might be to be defensive and deny they have a problem. They might think ‘everyone else is doing it’ because the acceptance of our drinking culture is so widespread that a lot of us might be classed as binge drinkers. Show concern rather than disapproval.
What to say – and what not to say
Using positive language is the key. “I wonder if you drink less your health/well-being may improve.” “I’ve noticed that you aren’t so positive about life since you’ve been drinking more. This isn’t the kind of person I know you to be. I’m not bringing it up to upset you, but because I’m concerned.”
Meanwhile, it’s definitely best to avoid harsh criticism, making judgements and labels such as “alcoholic”.
How to prepare
On a practical level, choosing your moment is also vital. for both of you. Make sure you’re both in the right mood, feeling calm, confident and not too emotional.
The AA Estcourt branch hosts meetings every Tuesday at Forderville Primary School from 7pm to 8pm. Contact Desigan on 082 849 3014.
The AA Winterton branch hosts meetings every Thursday at the Springfield Church opposite the police station from 7pm to 8pm. Contact Dolly on 071 688 5330 or Virgilo on 079 688 0432.
