I am writing this letter with a heavy heart because I recently received word that my father, who was born and raised in Estcourt, had taken ill. Reports of physical abuse by a partner (who he had supposedly been married to for the past 18 years) also surfaced.

Unable to wrap my head around these alleged atrocities, my husband and I set off from Johannesburg, to investigate further. We arrived at the residence with other family members as well as members of the police who accompanied us.

We were all deeply shocked at the sight of my father who appeared to be nothing but skin and bones.

He was unresponsive and unsteady on his feet and nothing like he had been the last time I saw him. When confronted, this woman accused my siblings and I of neglect and proceeded to verbally abuse and hurl insults at us, this all in the company of a strange, rugged man who had suddenly walked into the house within minutes of our arrival.

In our defence, we explained that our father had seemed content with his choice of partner and environment and we did not interfere with those choices until we heard reports of abuse taking place. Upon closer inspection we noticed bruises on my father’s wrists.

This woman admitted to handcuffing him, apparently at the advice of social workers, supposedly to prevent him from being violent and/or harming himself. We instantly removed our father from this visibly toxic environment and we have since seen no display of violent behaviour or anything that might warrant him having to be handcuffed. The most noticeable behaviour we have witnessed is him eating food as though he has been starved for days on end.

My father is currently in a place of safety but sadly, the damage has already been done. He is now in need of full-time care, has to wear nappies and both his hands remain bent and dysfunctional, which we suspect is as a result of being handcuffed for long periods of time.

He is edgy and fidgety, appears extremely afraid and when he is able to sleep, if at all, he sleeps in a tight foetal position. He constantly apologises and although medical reports have not confirmed this as yet, he appears to be suffering from either traumatic memory loss or some form of dementia, amongst other health issues.

We appeal to any social worker, neighbour or any other concerned persons who may know of or recognise these circumstances to please come forward with any information they may have as we will be pursuing legal action.

Chantel