Fifteen months ago, the unfathomable happened. In an incident of such malice, such disrespect and cruelty, Carla Mӧller’s life was irrevocably changed.
She was raped, but due to the non-violent nature of the incident, she was dissuaded from laying a formal complaint. According to her, her case was not allowed to be heard by law enforcement who refused to listen and justice wasn’t allowed to run its course.
“After the event I was very confused, uncomfortable and I knew something was wrong. I said no to having sex multiple times. This is me, I was raped. As far as I knew, rape only happened with somebody you didn’t know in unsafe environments. But, this was somebody I knew. I phoned a helpline and I went to see a social worker, who confirmed that I was raped. I still see a social worker on a weekly basis and a psychiatrist on a monthly basis. I’ve also spent time in a psychiatric hospital,” explains the 20-year-old from Bloemfontein.
In the aftermath she found a singular purpose.
“My big aim is for anyone who experiences this is for them to know that it was rape and it wasn’t their fault. After how my case was handled by those in our law system, I felt it was still my fault because of my prior actions, but no one should ever have to doubt what they’ve been through. They were raped, they survived and police should handle it the same as a violent rape. ‘No’ means ‘no’, which is not consent. My case was handled based on consumed consent, which there was none of.”
Now, the third-year Fashion Retail Management student at the North-West University, is adamant that her plight won’t befall other victims. Their voices will be heard.
On 17 May she launched the No Means No #itsnotjustoneofthosethings campaign with the aid of her residence on the campus in Potchefstroom, Kasteel. By selling No Means No T-shirts and speaking publicly about her ordeal, she hopes to create awareness about non-violent rape and to generate funds to donate to rape crises centers and further profits will go towards SRCS community projects.
“I hope to sell at least 200 t-shirts, which I encourage our students to wear in places such as bars or clubs as these are places where students are often sexually harassed but are not even aware of it. The aim is to remind people to be mindful of their actions as well as to keep their friends accountable,” she says.
She attests that it takes courage to speak about what has so long remain unspoken.
“It was intimidating getting up on a stage and speaking about my experience, but the feedback was overwhelmingly positive. As victims our stories need to be heard. We may feel that they are not worth telling, but that is not the case. The more people hear from us, the less incidents like these will happen. Rape, no matter the form, should never be pushed to the side. That is what I am striving for. This is the stand I am taking.”
Because now, and forever, ‘no’ must remain ‘no’.
To purchase a T-shirt, follow this link:
