Ways to beat the holiday blues this festive season
Most people cannot wait for the festive season, with Christmas carols everywhere, friends and family visits and children laughing. For some, this is a nightmare time, a time of feeling lost and alone.
POLOKWANE – Review spoke to Zelda Buitendag, a local psychologist, about how to beat the holiday blues.
Be realistic
A dream holiday is just that, a dream. A realistic holiday includes too much to do and not enough time. Too much to purchase and not enough money and too much to eat and not enough willpower.
“Fighting against the reality of your life at this moment will only make you more blue. Instead, be kind to yourself, laugh at yourself every now and then, seek support and vow to make some changes during a less stressful time of year.”
Work with what you have
Families change and grow and so will traditions. What worked for your family when you were a child, may not work for your family as an adult.
“Instead of trying to reproduce the exact old-fashioned holiday of your childhood, infuse what you can do with meaning, beauty and love. If you are divorced, share the holidays with your ex with as much generosity and harmony as you can. It will be the best gift you give to your children. If you are single or far away from your family, invite others into your home and give the words ‘extended family’ new meaning.”
Help others
When you help other people or animals, you will feel you mean something.
“Help others not because you should, but because it is the best antidote to self-pity and seasonal sadness. Find someone who is struggling more than you are, lend them a helping hand, and remember the real meaning of the festive season.”
Stop by a place of worship
“Drop into a Christian church, Muslim mosque, Jewish synagogue or Hindu template idea. Sometimes just sitting in sacred space can remind you of the true meaning of the holiday. Most places of worship welcome all people, even those just looking for a touch of grace in the midst of a stressful day. Instead of hurrying by that church you have passed a hundred times on the way to work, take a moment to enter its doors and sit quietly, imbibing the atmosphere and the prayers of its members.”
Take care of your body
“You have to eat well, drink a lot of water, exercise and sleep enough during the holiday. You will be amazed at how just a little bit of movement will lift your spirits and how reducing the amount of junk food, sugar and alcohol will reduce your blues. Do whatever it takes to get enough sleep. Sleep deprivation is at the root of many people’s depression.”
Be financially responsible
“Overspending during the holidays will not only increase your stress now, but will leave you feeling anxious for months afterward as you struggle to pay the bills. Don’t give in to buying expensive gifts but rather practice simplicity, creativity and basic human kindness.”
Grieve
In some families the loss of a friend of family member may be experienced. Or you may be far from home. Practice the lost art of grieving. Create an altar with pictures of those you love; light candles every night for someone you have lost; play sacred music and allow yourself to cry, remember, heal.”
Forgive
Make the decision to forgive all sorts of people this holiday season. Forgiveness is the salve that heals a broken spirit. Forgive people from your past, your work, your family and the ones in the news whom you love to hate.
Love
Love life and everything in it. Love the hard times, the cranky and crooked people of the world and love yourself with all of your appalling shortcomings.
Seek professional help
“You do not need to have full-blown depression to experience the holiday blues. Some people just feel the occasional stress and sadness during this time. If you have a period of more than two weeks where you have a depressed mood, crying spells, sleep problems, feelings of guilt and thoughts of death or suicide, you probably have major depression and should seek medical care. You’re moving beyond the holiday blues.”
