In her one-woman stage reading The Joke Was On Me, Swankie Mafoko lays her struggles bare.
History is littered with stories of comedians who died depressed.
This year, South African comedian Ebenhaezer Dibakwane died after struggling with mental illness. He is believed to have died from suicide.
“Ebby was a huge friend of mine, we were the same age…he died so depressed, yet he made people laugh,” Swankie Mafoko tells The Citizen.
The Our Perfect Wedding host lays her struggles bare in The Joke Was On Me, a one-woman show stage reading.
Mafoko is a lively person who is always the life of the party; however, like most comics and performers, she never dealt with her internal battles.
“I always like to crack jokes. I found that I used to crack jokes even when I was in pain. So the Joke Was On Me is about that, like I’ve been living in this façade, I’ve been making people laugh. The joke was on me because I didn’t respect myself enough to stop drinking; I didn’t respect myself enough to go through the grieving process.”
The 31-year-old actress, storyteller and mental health activist who has appeared in films such as How To Ruin Christmas is taking the audience on her journey of dealing with addiction, grief, and eventually finding healing.
“The girl who laughed because she couldn’t cry.”
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Dealing with grief
In early 2023, her brother, celebrity chef Lentswe Bhengu-Mafoko, died after a short illness. This turned her life upside down because of how close they were.
She says that she’s blocked out her brother’s passing because of the pain she still feels today.
“You know what your brain does when you’re trying not to remember…you don’t remember the date, but you remember the day.”
“Grief has done that for me.”
Mafoko also lost her father after her 21st birthday, and also dealt with the murder of her two brothers before Lentswe’s passing.
“Anybody who knows would notice how close we were [with Lentswe]. All of those things, I’ve taken that grief and put it in this faraway cupboard, where I can’t really remember the dates or remember the time because it hurts so much to do that.”
“The Joke Was On Me is focused on the traumas, it’s focused on the grief, and also on how much I was drinking. I’m not shy about the alcohol abuse. The Joke Was On Me is this one show where I go ‘Hi, look at me, I’m Swankie, and I’m human’.”
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Being an alcoholic
One morning, she realised that the only way for her to heal was to face her demons.
“I was in such a bad slump, and one day I woke up and said I can’t continue like this. I was drinking so much, not answering people’s phone calls.”
“The amount of alcohol I was drinking, I don’t think it was actually healthy for anyone. As well as the fact that it came around the time of mental health awareness month, it came around the time of Ocsober,” shares the actress.
She went to a facility, not a rehab, where she can detox and centre herself.
“A medical facility that gave me an implant called naltrexone, which basically takes away [the] craving for alcohol,” she says.
She spent two weeks at the medical facility, where she also received help from therapists. She has been alcohol-free for a few months now.
She describes her mother as a prayer warrior who kept on praying for her, and says her partner has also supported her. Her support structure also includes media personality Trevor Gumbi.
“I was so inspired by how he [Gumbi] was able to come out and say ‘Hi, I’m an alcoholic’ and I’m doing the same.”
Mafoko says it was a deliberate decision to have her show now in December, when stupendous amounts of alcohol are consumed.
“It is a very conscious decision because I mean we’re in the 16 Days of Activism and a lot of the GBV cases that we look at are inspired by the substance of alcohol abuse.”
“I needed people to take some time, just before December starts, to realise just how important substance abuse is in this country.”
The stage reading of The Joke Was On Me will be held this evening at the National School of the Arts in Braamfontein, Johannesburg.
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