What is ‘cobwebbing’ in relationships?

You’ve probably heard of spring cleaning, what about an autumnal cleaning session, this time for your relationships?

The term may conjure up spooky Halloweenesque decorations but the principle of cobwebbing in this context is about reflecting on your relationships and taking stock of what is preventing you from moving forward.

We explain.

How do you get past the negative memories of a toxic relationship and move on? This is the challenge of “cobwebbing,” the latest dating trend of the season.

The idea is to get rid of memories of places and objects linked to an ex-partner in order to take steps to meet new people. In the midst of “cuffing season,” it can be tempting to send a message to your ex and propose spending winter together as a couple.

But cobwebbing is an approach that looks to ensure this won’t happen. Cobwebbing encourages you to sort out your relationships.

Say goodbye to the people in your life who aren’t good for you, who drag you down. The idea is to make a fresh start with new people, in both friendships and romance. 

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According to Caroline West, Bumble’s sex and relationship expert, in comments relayed by Stylist, by “actively ‘cobwebbing’ your environment of the past, you can then move forward feeling more empowered, confident and open to meeting someone new.”

So how can we dust off our relationships? Easier said than done? “It can be a little trickier than just ‘removing’ cobwebs,” clinical sexologist and therapist Ness Cooper tells Metro. 

To do this, the first step is to give yourself time to grieve a relationship.

“Grieving the past, and what might have been in the future, is a healthy way to gain closure on the relationship and move on,” relationship coach Deb Morgan explained to Stylist.

The next step is to take stock of what you want to do next.

This allows you to project yourself into the future and gives you a sense of empowerment. Last but not least, stick to this decision and really turn the page on toxic relationships.