Cliff Buchler
2 minute read
24 Mar 2021
8:38 am

Please put politicians on truth pill

Cliff Buchler

The first roll-out starts with parliamentarians. Next in line are forked-tongued hacks, like self-indulgent columnists churning out fake facts and figures.

File picture. ANC Secretary General, Ace Magashule appears at Bloemfontein Magistrate's Court with his co-accused, including 3 people arrested last night on February 19, 2021 in Bloemfontein, South Africa. Magashule were arrested, charged and released on bail in connection with the multimillion rand asbestos contract scandal in the Free State. (Photo by Gallo Images/Alet Pretorius)

Most politicians are pathological liars. It comes with the murky territory. Now it’s rumoured scientists have created a “truth pill” which spots any lies, blots them out, allowing only truths to surface in the brain. According to a leaked document, the basic ingredients are a bat’s testicles. Not unlike meat improving with hanging, the bat’s balls become malleable and easy to work with the longer it dangles. Scientists are sure to be looking for recognised liars for testing the testicular fusion. Easy. Target the Zondo Commission witnesses. And there’s the Umkhonto equivocator, if he’s not falling on his own spear....