No to Supermom Syndrome

Social media, celebrities and their post-baby bodies, pop culture and societal expectations, all paint a picture of the “supermom” who effortlessly balances their career, family, relationships, and personal well-being with boundless energy and flawless execution.

Today, the pressure on moms to excel in every part of their lives is more intense than ever before. The rise of the “supermom” archetype, celebrated and pushed by society has created an image of a mom who can do it all with a smile on her face, however, the harsh reality is that being a “supermom” can be more stressful than empowering, creating the lesser spoken about Supermom Syndrome.

“At the heart of Supermom Syndrome also lies the pressure to meet unrealistic expectations. The pursuit of perfection in motherhood sets idealistic standards that are impossible to meet. From maintaining a spotless home to preparing Pinterest-worthy meals, managing children’s schedules, excelling in careers, and looking flawless while doing it all, the expectations placed on moms these days are overwhelming,” commented Bronwyn Ragavan, brand manager for Personal Touch and Chemico.

Bronwyn believes that this Mother’s Day is the perfect time to start being the mom you are meant to be, not the mom you believe you have to be, and suggested the following ways to try and navigate yourself out of the cycle of trying to be a “supermom”.

It is important to remember that motherhood is messy, chaotic, and imperfect, which is perfectly normal:

• Instead of striving for perfection, focus on being present, set realistic expectations, and prioritise self-care while remembering there is no such thing as the perfect mother.

• It’s okay to ask for help, to say no. Family members and friends will never expect you to struggle every day and will happily help out when you need them to. If your children are of an age when chores can be allocated, definitely include them in day-to-day activities to help lessen your load.

• You are also important and therefore need to prioritise your own needs. A mom whose batteries are half full cannot give her children her full attention. Take time to exercise, meditate, have a bubble bath, or even set aside some time to read a book (one without pictures). All these moments will help you recharge and give your best.

• “No” needs to become your new favourite word. Don’t overcommit yourself by saying yes to every activity and invitation. You need to prioritise your time to work for you and your family, and not for everyone else. Learn to set boundaries to give yourself peace.

• Go off social media. If the World Wide Web is making you feel bad about yourself, then you need to stop scrolling. Social media is used to present a perfect life, and not the tough times. Accept that these perfect moms are only perfect when a camera is recording their lives.

• Just as you would celebrate your child’s achievements, learn to celebrate your own, no matter how small. Give yourself credit for the things you have achieved rather than focusing on what is still on your to-do list.

• If you are finding things tougher than they need to be find someone to talk to. Feeling overwhelmed, stressed or inadequate are not emotions to overlook, and should be taken seriously.