Dating older men is trending for Gen Z women who prefer them over peers. Here's why this trend keeps on growing.
It is not about sugar daddies or sugar babies at all. It’s a real and growing trend backed up by research. A growing number of Gen Z women desire older men and are not shying away from it, no matter the age gap.
And older men are not oblivious to this, either.
Relationship expert Lisa Welsh of Savethatspark.com said that younger women are making conscious choices about who they date and what the picture looks like, even on Instagram.
“They want maturity, stability and clarity. They are looking for partners who meet them where they are in life, and very often those partners are older men,” she said.
There are several reasons why this trend is not slowing down.
Choosing emotional maturity
Gen Z women have noted that the dating pond amongst peers feels a bit small.
Welsh said younger women often find that their male counterparts are still figuring out who they are, while older men have already passed that phase.
“Gen Z women want clear communication and emotional steadiness. They are looking for shared values and older partners are less swayed by online spaces like the manosphere. That makes them more grounded and often more aligned with progressive thinking,” she said.
The manosphere is described as virtual gathering places where men often share hyper-masculine or anti-feminist views.
A report published by the New York Post earlier this year noted the same trend, that older men are seen as luckily missing the wave of manosphere influence that has shaped younger male behaviour.
Stability when life’s uncertain
The cost of living is rising, and so too are all shapes and sizes of debt. Career paths are less predictable than they used to be, and even the very act of landing a job is not a certainty anymore.
“Young women are not chasing wealth, but they do want stability,” Welsh said.
“They want partners who can stand beside them with a sense of direction. An older man is more likely to be established in his career and have his finances in order. That makes him attractive in a way that has little to do with being flashy and everything to do with reliability.”
No Games, No More
The ills, aches, and pains of modern dating, like ghosting, misfiring signals, lack of commitment and hookups for fun, have taken a toll on Gen Z women’s emotional sensibilities, and they are tired of it.
Welsh said older men are often more upfront about what they want in a couple-up.
“Dating fatigue is real for Gen Z women. They are tired of uncertainty. They find older men are usually clearer about wanting commitment and less likely to waste their time,” she said.
Media Changed Relationship Models
Whether it’s social media posts, TikTok chinwags or shows like The White Lotus, age gap relationships are the new normal in the media.
“Media has given young women permission to see these relationships as legitimate,” Welsh said. “It is not seen as scandalous in the way it once was. It is simply another way to find a partner who fits.”
A survey reported by the New York Post in April this year noted that rubber-stamping of age gap relationships in the media is both driving social acceptance and seeding desire among young women to date older men. This despite the fact that they may not even have considered it an option some time ago.
Also Read: 7 Ways Gen Z is Living The Soft Life, and what it costs
Age Gaps Are Wide
Research by dating platform Flirtini suggested that nearly forty percent of Gen Z women’s likes on dating apps go to men that are more than a decade their senior. A good number of these relationships carry an average age gap of 10 and 14 years.
Welsh said these choices are deliberate.
“Women are not just looking at men a couple of years ahead. They are actively choosing older partners who they believe can match their goals and outlook,” she said.
Rebellion Against Old Norms
In the past, women were always expected to date within age band limits and to stick to their own age group. It is no longer a rule of thumb.
“Gen Z women are less concerned about what society expects and more concerned about what works for them.
“They are making dating decisions that reflect their needs instead of tagging along with tradition,” Welsh said.
A survey published by DatingNews in 2024 showed that almost sixty percent of age gap relationships involved a younger woman dating an older man, a longstanding pattern now openly embraced and encouraged by Gen Z.
Choosing Deep Over Shallow Waters
Studies still show that on blind dates, both men and women often show a snap preference for youth.
A large-scale study conducted by the University of California Davis in the United States in January found that 55% of participants were more drawn to younger partners in initial meetings. But Gen Z women are choosing differently in the real world.
“They are not only thinking about attraction in the moment. They are thinking about what makes a relationship last,” Welsh said.
For many, that is simply choosing older partners who are emotionally more mature, available and ready to commit, without the nonsense that younger men tend to be distracted by.
Welsh said the trend is here to stay.
“Gen Z women are taking stock of what dating has started to look like. They are contemplating their own realities, taking stock.
“Also, they are responding to it and owning it. They want partners who are serious about building something real and grounded, and for Gen Z women that person happens to be older. It is as simple as that.”
