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By Karabo Motsiri Mokoena

Writer. Conversationalist. South African Mommy Blogger,Content Producer


Why do kids bite?

There are various reasons why kids bite but there are ways to manage it.


Early childhood development comes with a lot of interesting discoveries for your little one. They discover that their fingers can pick things up, that things do exist even when they are not on sight, and that their teeth work. Yes. Toddlers are prone to biting and this is part of their normal development.

According to Healthline a lot of babies bite because of teething. They bite on their little soothers and anything they can get their teeth on, including humans. So their biting is not malicious at all.

“Biting also can be a way for toddlers to get attention or express how they’re feeling” according to Health for Kids. If they bite you the very first time and you react, they will do it to solicit a similar reaction from you or other people.

Parents learn that child development comes with a lot of tantrums and frustrations. Their source is the inability to verbally express how they feel or what they want.

For children that can’t speak yet, they find other ways to communicate what is happening to them. A teething child is communicating that they are in pain. A child that wants attention will also bite.

If your child disapproves of something, they will also bite. This way they are saying “I don’t like this and I am feeling scared and unsafe”.

2-year-olds have no sense of self-control, and thus they are more prone to biting. A 3-year old might be less prone to biting because they can verbally express themselves.

According to the Centre for Community Inclusion and Disability Studies, there are five main emotions that children are expressing through biting. These include:

  • Frustration
  • Anger
  • Excitement
  • Anxiety
  • Fear

Even in the playground as they play with other kids, they bite because they are feeling one of the above emotions.

The trick is to be able to identify the emotion your child is experiencing as they bite. Then, talking them through it and teaching them “biting is wrong and it hurts people”. Give them a firm “no biting” lesson.

When you have identified that it is a tactic to get attention, then you can manage it accordingly. According to the National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC), giving the victim attention after a biting incident will show the biter that biting creates the opposite effect to what he meant.

It is also important to note that biting should be managed from the very first episodes before they mature into a habit. If not, it becomes the go-to strategy to express emotions according to NAEYC.

The NAEYC also recommends that parents feed their children and put them to bed on time. Frustrations stemming from hunger and missing naps can lead kids to bite.

What parents and teachers should never do is react negatively or bite back. Staying calm (as hard as it may be) is key in such situations. Also, avoid giving them too much attention because toddlers love attention and will repeat this behaviour.

Punishment sounds like the appropriate outcome in a biting case. This could be further from the truth. Punishment leads to further anger and frustrations which does not alleviate the reasons behind the biting. The aim is to deal with the source of the problem.

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