Social integration is one of the most important aspects for any child at school and this area is affected by the way in which they experience the world in an introverted or extroverted manner.
The debate between introversion and extroversion has raged on for a long while, with countless books being published on this subject, especially at school level where a person’s social-forming period is in full swing.
According to Dr Elize Kruger, a psychologist at Hoërskool Nelspruit, introversion and extroversion are about human interaction, the need for socialisation and the various energies that are spent.
The strongest characteristic of introverts is that they draw energy from internal ideas, thoughts and emotions, while extroverts draw strength and inspiration from the outside world, such as connecting with people.
“Introverts get tired when exposed to masses of people while extroverts feed off their energy. Introverts boost their energy levels through alone time, while the latter quickly tire of being alone,” she explained one of the many factors.
In a nutshell, the difference is that extroverts like to experience a lot, while introverts like to know a lot about what they experience.
Introverts are most at home in nature and in front of books, while extroverts need the human element in their lives. This does not necessarily mean that introverts don’t need the company of others.
Nothing is either black or white. Humans cannot exist without human interaction just as they also need time alone to think. The emotional reaction to a situation is one of the aspects that differs. An introvert would internalise the matter, while an extrovert would verbalise the situation.
The world has been modelled to fit them and this is one of the main reasons why introverts are sometimes overlooked for top positions in society.
According to Dr Thelma Laubscher, an educational psychologist of Barberton, it is better to classify children as being verbal and non-verbal at an early age as their personalities have not yet developed.
“One of the major differences between introverts and extroverts is their comfort in social situations. Introverts are normally shy of nature and feel uncomfortable when making unexpected eye contact,” Laubscher says.
According to an article by Mary Olsen Laney, “The Introvert Advantage”, culture and the extroverted world view have created a negative image of solitude and reflection.
This attitude is also present in most schools with the popular and talkative children regularly being involved in leadership roles from a young age. They also climb the popularity stakes.
Introversion is a temperament and not a personality that can be changed. It is rather an innate human quality that should be embraced.
Another interesting aspect is the manner in which communication would occur with direct contact.
An example would be if parents ask direct questions, such as “How was your day at school?” The child would then give only a one-word answer without describing the day. If your non-verbal child is upset then he may most likely withdraw, while a verbal child will tell everything that happened to get rid of all the pent-up emotion.
This is especially prevalent in schools where a non-verbal child would feel helpless to diffuse a situation and would then resort to physically attacking a bully.
It is important to approach your child in the correct manner to get the best response from him or her. A non-verbal child could most likely come on his own later when he gets used to the teacher and his classmates.
A child’s self-image is built from the feedback he or she receives from society, friends as well as the parents’ involvement.
It is important to realise that personality and aptitude are closely linked. An introvert would choose a job which makes him feel comfortable and at ease. When he chooses to speak or give his opinion he would do so on a subject which he knows.
It saddens Laubsher that leaders are often chosen based on emotive and verbal qualities while other quiet children are often not seen as leaders even though they have excellent qualities.
“Introverted teens are more likely to shine in high school than in primary school, as they can then choose subjects that they are most interested in. Unfortunately they are also seen as shy and weird in some instances for not conforming to the popular guidelines of society,” she said.
“It is important that parents teach their children that it is okay being introverted and shy and that in life one needs to be yourself and not change for anything society seems to demand,” Laubscher said.
