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By Kekeletso Nakeli

Columnist


Where has the respect for marriage gone?

Women now have been given the unpaid role of guarding grown men from slay queens, blessees and those who preach that #hoeislife.


How do we begin to converse about the now infamous Rachel Kolisi tweet without speaking about the dynamics of gender in society being the springboard of conversation?

We cannot speak to her intention when the comment was made, but we should ask ourselves that if it were a comment made of a woman, would the furore have been the same?

Would it have trended? Would a man even have to feel the need to defend his position? Would his partner feel that her being labelled a “type” was offensive?

“He is not a type, he’s a married man responsible for four children,” read Rachel’s tweet.

Although we roll our eyes as we read it and question her need to remind us of a commitment that he made to her and their family, we have to remember that there was even a response tweet that said “he checks all the right boxes and is perfect to be a side dish…”

Where has the respect for marriage gone? Why is family no longer something that we understand to be sacred?

While the tweet may have meant no harm, the need to respond to it shows that the family structure in society is under constant threat.

Why has the man in society become a commodity that has to be fought over?

Why is there a need to be at war with possible competitors?

Women are, by nature, multitaskers. We work in industry, run the home, raise children. And, in some instances, we even raise the man.

But now we have been given the unpaid role of guarding grown men from slay queens, blessees and those who preach that #hoeislife.

While these women would never bark up an unwilling tree, they are made by the men of our society.

Being married or seriously involved in the 21st century is by far one of the toughest roles women have to undertake.

We are dictated to by those who have never walked a mile in our shoes, those that have no idea that having to respond to some comments is the preservation of the home life we are trying to build.

Kekeletso Nakeli-Dhliwayo.

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