Lowvelder investigates: Protect your child against sexting dangers

MBOMBELA – A child who is comfortable with sex is less likely to fall prey to sexual predators. Giving children a clear understanding of sex is paramount in ensuring their online safety.

This is according to sexologist Timothy Kieswetter.

Kieswetter acknowledged that this concept may seem strange, even avant-garde to some.
“Grown-ups find it difficult to comprehend why children sext,” he told Lowvelder yesterday.

“We must keep in mind that children have different reasons than adults for participating in sexual behaviour,” he said.

A child or teenager’s number one mandate, according to Kieswetter, is surviving by blending in. If everyone else sexts, he or she feels obliged to do the same. He pointed out that young people are susceptible to trends.

“Sometimes it is yo-yo’s, Pokémon or spinners. Sexting is such a trend,” he explained.

Secondly, Kieswetter said that children copy their parents. “They know what you are up to on your phone,” he warned.
Thirdly, he compared sexting to a McDonald’s drive-through. “It’s easy. Sexting is the fast-food version of intimacy. People don’t have time for courtship anymore,” he stated simply.

The existence of sexual predators is what makes modern-day, intimate teenage relationships dangerous.

“Years ago, intimate communication between two persons would have remained intimate,” he said.

With the advent of social media and cloud storage, intimate messages between young lovers surface on the World Wide Web, where sex offenders and predators have access to it.

To protect children from such dangerous people, Kieswetter suggested arming them with high sexual IQs.

“Every sexual action has an intensity. If someone with a low sexual IQ is confronted with an online message that has a high sexual frequency, he is more likely to give in. He ‘freezes’,” said Kieswetter.

• How should a parent react?
  “Education and open communication channels are important when it comes to sex,” he said. According to Kieswetter, parents must inform children on what sex is from an early age. It should not be a taboo topic in the household.
  Information on the topic should not be withheld from children. He added that the more a person knows about sex, the lower his curiosity level will be and he will be less susceptible to sexual predators. “Being comfortable with the topic will empower and protect children,” he concluded.
• *Lowvelder and Timothy Kieswetter will do follow-up reports on the topic. On November 18, he will perform Die Stripshow – an entertaining, informative talk – at Emnotweni. Call 086-100-0291 to book your seat.