The Lowvelder’s excuse for arriving at work late

Arriving for work late is embarassing.

You know the feeling.

While driving into the parking lot, you assess the situation. “What am I going to tell my boss?” you wonder.

You end up tiptoeing into the office.

Nobody will notice, right?

Wrong.

You are met with your boss’ stare. If he or she wears spectacles, the dramatic effect of a condescending stare really hits home.

Luckily, this is the Slowveld. According to some, ‘anything goes’ around here.

If you are a Lowvelder, you whip up one of these totally believable excuses:

• A lion held me up.

• The traffic light was not working. Judging by how regularly this happens, your excuse might just carry weight.

• I was a pedestrian in Riverside. Trust me, getting around there takes a while.

• A cow blocked the road.

• Some guy was spinning his car, or ‘making doughnuts’ or whatever it is called. I did not get close enough to investigate.

…And just like that, Bob’s your uncle!