Festive decorations are down, gifts linger, and reality hits—but slowly, peace returns as the holidays retreat into memory.
The decorations are down, the last piece of fruitcake has achieved rock-like density and your house no longer smells like beer, custard and emotional overspending. Christmas is officially over.
And now you’re left staring at a half-empty tin of chocolates and a family you’re not quite ready to make eye contact with again.
The first phase after the festivities is confusion. You wake up to realise there are no leftovers to eat for breakfast. The braai meat is gone. The huge trifle is a memory.
You stand in front of the fridge like a lost tourist: “Is this… lettuce?” And you don’t even remember buying vegetables.
After confusion comes the dreaded financial hangover. You open your bank app slowly, as it might bite unexpectedly.
Somehow, you spent R600 on gift wrap alone. Why is wrapping paper priced like a limited-edition artwork?
And why did you buy bows for people who don’t even like you that much? This is when you vow to lie low for the next Christmas, but know it won’t happen.
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Then there’s the emotional withdrawal. No more happy carols blaring in malls. No more “special vibes”. Just normal life creeping back in, wearing sweatpants and bad news.
You’re expected to go back to work and pretend spreadsheets are more exciting than Christmas pudding. They’re not. They’ll never be.
The tree is now your enemy. It stands there in its full glory and you know it is going to take you forever to take the decorations down.
You keep telling yourself you’ll pack it away “tomorrow”. Three weeks later, it will still be in the corner, judging you.
Meanwhile, your house is full of gifts that you don’t know how to use. You’ve got a wafflemaker the size of a small car and a decorative bowl you’re afraid to touch.
Someone gave you socks so fancy that you don’t feel worthy of wearing them.
Then comes the toughest part: January.
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This is not a real month. It’s a personality test. It lasts for 47 days.
Everyone is broke. Your New Year’s resolutions are already tired.
You’re meant to “eat clean” while staring at the leftover chocolate Santa that you refuse to throw away because it has a face.
But slowly, something strange happens.
The quiet becomes… peaceful. The normal days return. Life settles. And you realise Christmas isn’t really over.
It’s just gone back into hiding, waiting, planning, and watching you. All year long…
Happy New Year.
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