carine hartman 2021

By Carine Hartman

Chief sub-editor


Three words for Khanyi Mbau: get a life

You have the power to change women and men through your words.


Three words of advice for “missing” Khanyi Mbau: get a life. A real life, like the rest of us. You’ll never read about real people getting dropped off at a nail bar in Dubai – who visits a nail bar while there, I roll my eyes – and our partners will never post social media rants about us ignoring them because the pool boy is interesting six hours later. Because we are real and don’t have mere mortals kissing our feet; we don’t have the diva luxuries of a nation freaking out while we booze the night up and even…

Subscribe to continue reading this article
and support trusted South African journalism

Access PREMIUM news, competitions
and exclusive benefits

SUBSCRIBE
Already a member? SIGN IN HERE

Three words of advice for “missing” Khanyi Mbau: get a life.

A real life, like the rest of us.

You’ll never read about real people getting dropped off at a nail bar in Dubai – who visits a nail bar while there, I roll my eyes – and our partners will never post social media rants about us ignoring them because the pool boy is interesting six hours later.

Because we are real and don’t have mere mortals kissing our feet; we don’t have the diva luxuries of a nation freaking out while we booze the night up and even fly home without telling a soul.

We talk to our partners – or should I say loved ones – because we love them. Deeply. And we know the world doesn’t revolve around whether we are sitting down or not.

In fact, we are so real that, should we go “missing” in Dubai, the embassy would jump into action investigating real horrors like sex trafficking, being whisked away to some dark dungeon because you wore your jeans and didn’t cover your head – like what’s happening in Afghanistan as we speak.

Not that you’ll know about Biden blowing up 10 kids “by accident” over there because neither Instagram, nor Twitter, really rips your heart out.

For that kind of ache, you actually have to care enough to read the news. Not the hype that comes up around your name: real news; real lives… And I have real news for you, Khanyi: a study – yes, they do those all the time – showed people are fed up with social media.

People, real people, are leaning towards real life, not the oxymoron of virtual reality.

So you can either drop the way you use social media now, or become redundant once this wave passes like the latest Covid.

Forget the pool boys, nails, hype of “maybe Khanyi’s a gender violence victim” – what a disservice your “disappearance” did the cause there – and show the real Khanyi.

If there was abuse, don’t hide behind “I’m fine”. Speak out.

So, spend the three hours with your make-up artist looking fabulous, but when you let those red-nailed thumbs work on your phone, make it count. You have the power to change women and men through your words.

Your choice.

Read more on these topics

Columns Gender-based Violence (GBV) Khanyi Mbau

Access premium news and stories

Access to the top content, vouchers and other member only benefits