Our love is no different to yours

It’s the year 2017 and we all have the right to be the person we want to be – but for people in same-sex relationships, this is sometimes a little trickier.

The Courier caught up with local performing artist Katy Visagie – or “Katy Wolfe” as her fans know her – to find out what it’s like being in a same-sex relationship in Ballito.

Katy and her girlfriend Taz (who’s surname is withheld to protect her privacy) have been seeing one another for just over a year and have had to overcome several potential stumbling blocks in their inter-religious, mixed race, same-sex, long distance relationship.

Also read: Dating across the racial divide

“Heterosexual couples do not realise just how privileged they are. You can go out and hold hands or kiss each other without getting stared at. You do not have to consider who’s going to be there, or what kind of place it is when you go out for dinner,” said Visagie.

“I am about as ‘out of the closet’ as it is possible to be but – while Taz’s folks know, her family is Muslim and she has not told the rest of them yet.”

Visagie met Taz just over a year ago while she was in Johannesburg visiting a friend.

“We went out to Melville and had a few drinks. I walked up to a group of girls and offered to buy tequila, when one of them told me there was someone I just had to meet.

As it turns out, Taz had seen Katy earlier that day and thought she was quite attractive – and they just so happened to go out to the same place that evening.

“Two or three weeks later I convinced her to fly down and that’s how our relationship started.”

Katy came out to her parents when she was 17 and said that at first, they weren’t thrilled.

“They sat me down and told me I was being deceived by the devil.”

All in all though, she said that they did not react badly and have come a long way since then, accepting her for who she is and apologising for their initial response.

Also read: Adopting a colourful future

“Honestly, I am still a little worried about getting married one day. Parents naturally have a picture in their minds of what they want for their daughter, and I just want them to be happy on that day.”

However, it is not family that causes the pair the most irritation.

“Any time we go out as a couple and happen to talk to men, they invariably make inappropriate sexual advances on us, which is extremely annoying – neither of us wants to sleep with you! And guys – I am not a lesbian just because I have not slept with the right guy yet!”

Visagie said it was interesting meeting Taz’s Muslim grandmother.

“I found them to be very welcoming, and excellent hosts – though she did think I was just a really good friend who flew up to visit her granddaughter when she was sick.”

Niether of them have told their grandparents that they are lesbian.

“But I am sure they have guessed – how many girls will I have had to bring home for the holidays before they figure it out…”

>>  Expect to find the latest trends in Health, Wellness and Beauty in Ballito.

>> Meet the top players in the North Coast property industry. See our Property People feature.

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