Sibling rivalry is the gift that keeps on giving

Sibling rivalry – the timeless tradition of competing with someone who shares your DNA and probably your Netflix password.

It’s nature’s way of keeping family gatherings spicy and ensuring that no-one ever feels too confident for too long.

Because nothing humbles you faster than a sibling casually reminding you of that time you thought a stapler was a phone.

Or when you thought something you did as a child was a well-hidden secret, but everyone in your family gets to know all about it over a braai.

Sibling rivalry starts early.

Before you can even spell “rivalry” you’re locked in an epic battle over who gets the last cookie, the coveted front seat, or the highly coveted role of “Mom’s favourite” – a title that is as elusive as our tokoloshe, but somehow more hotly debated.

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Toddlers squabble over silly little things like toys, the fighting mostly resulting in shrill squeals and feisty hairpulling.

And just when you think they have outgrown that phase, they take a break from openly fighting for a short period and become teenagers.

Hairpulling has evolved into fierce battles over bathroom schedules, fashion choices and who borrowed whose clothes without asking (and left it at a friend’s house).

As adults, you’d think the rivalry would mellow out. It doesn’t. It just evolves. Now the competitions are slightly subtler but no less fierce:

Who has the better job? The cooler vacation photos? The more obedient dog?

Family group chats become battlegrounds where memes are weaponised and passive-aggressive compliments are the artillery of choice. Rivalry has by then become a crafty art.

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Who can outdo who in whatever field is deemed necessary to give them the edge.

Of course, underneath all the playful jabs and one-upmanship, there’s a bond that even the fiercest rivalry can’t break.

After all, who else remembers the exact trauma of your shared family road trips? Or can decode your childhood nickname without cringing?

Siblings are the original frenemies – simultaneously your biggest competitor and your most loyal ally.

So, whether you’re still arguing over who broke the lamp in 1997, or competing for the title of “Coolest Aunt/Uncle,” just remember: sibling rivalry is less about winning and more about having someone who will roast you at your wedding … but also help you move furniture or tow a broken down vehicle without expecting pizza as payment.

Probably.

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