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Children learn to trust the hands that feed them. For most, those hands belong to loving mothers.
But sometimes the person meant to shield a child becomes the source of its deepest harm.
“For nearly four decades, I have seen the devastating consequences when caregivers fail their children,” said Shaheda Omar, a veteran child‑protection practitioner at the Teddy Bear Foundation.
Moms aroused by their kids; lewd exchanges on WhatsApp
A developing case in eThekwini shows this. Reaction Unit South Africa (RUSA) said it had received videos, images and messages that appear to show two Durban‑area mothers forcing their children to perform sexual acts and trading the material between them on WhatsApp.
A Chatsworth mother called the Verulam office in May 2026 to report her female lover from Phoenix.
She claimed that the Phoenix woman was forcing her six-year-old daughter to perform sexual acts on her.
But screenshots that the Chatsworth woman sent to the security company showed that she was also seemingly abusing her seven-year-old son.
However, Vinod Singh of Reaction Unit SA said the initial source has since disappeared.
“We’re just hoping that if the child is in school, or one of the children speaks out to a neighbour or another child, somehow they get found and they get the help that they need,” he said.
The South African Police Service (Saps) confirmed it has received the information but has not registered a case.
“In the absence of a complainant’s statement, no case has yet been registered.”
Just last month, a Gauteng mom was on trial for allegedly pimping her minor daughters into sex work, excusing it under the guise of ‘getting fed.’
Advertising her daughters on lewd websites, the mother pleaded not guilty as she believed that she didn’t know what she was doing was wrong.
Just can’t wrap your head around it
“Society finds it hard to imagine mothers as sexual predators. That blind spot leaves some victims invisible,” said Omar.
She calls it one of the most wrenching betrayals. Abuse by mothers can take two forms: direct sexual abuse by the mother herself, or a mother who facilitates exploitation by others, like trading a child for money, shelter, drugs or protection.
Both wreck trust and attachment, and both demand urgent, specialised responses, practitioners say.
“Poverty, substance dependency and coercion are common backdrops,” Omar said. “They help explain how it happens, but they never excuse it. The child’s safety must come first.”
Why silence and denial persist
Several forces keep a mother’s criminal behaviour hidden.
Children often lack the agency or language to disclose abuse by a primary caregiver. Communities and professionals hold entrenched views of mothers as natural protectors, and that bias can stall investigations.
Siblings may stay silent out of loyalty or fear of family breakup.
“The emotional betrayal is often as damaging as the physical abuse,” Omar said.
Victims typically show complex trauma: attachment disorders, self‑harm, school failure, sexualised behaviour and prolonged difficulty forming healthy adult relationships, she said.
Recovery requires long‑term, trauma‑informed therapy.
Technology multiplies risk
Online platforms, like WhatsApp, have expanded how children are exploited.
Grooming, live‑streamed abuse, and the sharing of exploitative material make detection harder and harm more wide‑reaching.
While evidence of mothers facilitating technology‑driven abuse is limited, Omar warned practitioners to stay alert: caregivers can enable online exploitation either deliberately or through severe neglect.
A call to act, not to judge
“We need data that reflects the full picture,” Omar said. “That will improve prevention, risk assessment and the help we give children.”
“Every disclosure deserves careful, evidence‑based assessment centred on the child’s voice,” said Childline KwaZulu-Natal. “We must respond without prejudice.”
The eThekwini case remains under investigation. RUSA and the SAPS say they are pursuing leads and have urged anyone with information to come forward.
For now, the allegations stand as a grim reminder that even the most sacred roles can be corrupted.
